Blackout
by DZ2
Summary: Harry Potter is said to be the poster boy for the light, but what happens when the lights go out? VERY Dark/Evil OP Harry/Harem
1. A Very Different Harry

Blackout: A Harry Potter Fanfiction

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Harry Potter or any of its associated characters: all rights belong to JK Rowling. I do not own any crossover references used in the story: all rights belong to their original creators. I do own any OC spells explained at the end of a chapter.

**Plot: **Harry Potter is said to be the poster boy for the light, but what happens when the lights go out?

**Author's Note: **So, here we have a random, but, hopefully, fun idea that's sort of inspired by several other fandoms, themes and ideas just brought together for the hell of it, so, really, all that's left to say is the usual.

If you don't like it, don't read it.

**Dedication: **I'd like to dedicate this story to my friends, fans and fellow Darksiders: my recommended reads are _Harry Potter and the Revival of Soul Magic, Harry Potter: Birth of Technomancy_ and _The Court of Shadows_ by AlphaPheonix, _When the Thunder Breaks_ by WeLonelyOldSouls, _The Downward Spiral Saga_ – _Harry Potter and the Homecoming, Harry Potter and Salazar's Legacy, Harry Potter and the Year of Broken Chains, Harry Potter and the Return of the Lost, Harry Potter and the Dirge of Hope _and _Harry Potter and the End of War_ – by BolshevikMuppet99, _Damaged Raven_ and _Dark Lord Potter_ by JustBored21, _Harry Is A Dragon, And That's Okay_ by Saphroneth, _Harry Potter and The Ashes of Chaos_ by ACI100, _The Dark Lord Peverell-Slytherin_ by Ares Peverell-Slytherin, _Yield to the Darkness_ and _Just A Touch of Kleptomania_ by Quatermass, _Dark Lord Potter_ by loverofeevee and _Path to Power_ by sirius009

**Key Pairing: **Harry/Harem (Harry/Lavender/Daphne/Tonks/Luna/Astoria)

**Other Pairings: **To be determined

Normal Speech

'Thoughts'

'_Mental Speech_'

/_Parseltongue_/

Chapter 1: A Very Different Harry

Albus Dumbledore was a man who liked to think he _knew_ how things should be, most of the time because he _made_ them that way.

Light was light, Dark was dark, Death Eaters were lost souls who only needed the kindness of others to be given a second chance for greatness, the world had to be the way it was for the Greater Good and, of course, he was the guiding light behind the world whom everyone looked up to.

Having vanquished one dark leader and then been the bane, and only thing feared by another, Albus was given the mantle of Light Lord for a reason, not to mention his other titles of Chief Warlock, Grand Sorcerer and Supreme Mugwump. He was the head of the world's greatest defence against the ever-constant threat of the Dark and he _always_ had a plan to take on any obstacles that might threaten the future of his world.

So, when he was told of a prophecy with a child born with the power to vanquish the Dark, he was intrigued.

When he steered the ones identified by the prophecy to go into hiding, he saw it as being for the best, if not for the Greater Good.

When they died, sacrificing themselves so the world could witness the end of the Dark Lord Voldemort at the hands of the Chosen One, Albus saw that as being for the Greater Good and, despite the arguments of others, he made sure the Chosen One was _safe_ and somewhere he couldn't be corrupted into believing things he didn't need to know about.

And, ten years later, when Albus knew the day was coming for the letters to be sent out, he knew his Chosen One would be ready.

The world would endure because the Chosen One was there to see it still turned.

And if he died in the process?

Well, then that was for the Greater Good too…

Or so Albus thought, until he got the bad news from his deputy.

_**Blackout**_

"Albus!"

As soon as the door to his office opened, admitting a white-faced Minerva McGonagall who seemed to be somewhere between angry and beyond terrified, Albus was instantly on high alert, "Minerva, what is it? Is everything all right? You look like…well, hopefully our resident spectres will forgive the crude remark, but you look like you've seen a ghost."

"It…it's Harry…Harry P-P-P-Potter!" gasped Minerva, earning a shocked look from Albus as he sat bolt upright in his throne, his grandfatherly persona fading away, even as he watched while Minerva dropped the letter onto Albus' desk, "He says…I don't…well…just read it."

Lowering his eyes to the parchment, Albus' eyes scanned the information there, but, as he did so, his eyes only grew wider as he read the message written on the parchment.

_Dear Deputy Headmistress Minerva McGonagall,_

_My name is Harry Potter and I wish to be as blunt as I can when I tell you this._

_I have NO desire to go anywhere near your slaughterhouse and walk to my death just because your blue-eyed shepherd gets all twinkly and decides it's about time he step out of the shadows and let me come home to the world I belong._

_As far as I am concerned, the only reason I would go anywhere near that madhouse is if the 'noble' Albus Dumbledore comes to me himself, gets down on his wrinkly, skeletal knees and BEGS me to attend, because that's the only good thought I would have as I endure the boredom of your lessons, your hypocrisy in calling me something I am not and NEVER want to be._

_And, just in case you hand this notice to that whiskered wanker, let me be as blunt as I can to him too:_

_Hello Mr Dumbledore, I imagine you're as shocked as your sheep is about how little I care about what you and your world want with me._

_Well, here's the reason why._

_YOU MURDERED MY PARENTS, YOU SENILE OLD BASTARD!_

_Why would I EVER come anywhere near you, unless it is to take back the lives you stole by making you BEG for death?_

_So, you want me? _

_Come find me at the enclosed address and, as I said to your Pinocchio, BEG me, Geppetto!_

_MAYBE then, I'll consider it enough to come and entertain you, and myself too, long enough to watch you squirm._

_Otherwise, fuck you very much and leave me alone._

_Oh, and if any more owls come looking for answers, just a warning:_

_I know some VERY hungry dogs!_

_Yours NEVER,_

_Harry James Potter_

With trembling fingers, wide, almost-tearful eyes and an air of absolute disbelief that seemed to be permanently etched onto his face, Albus swallowed hard as he looked up to Minerva before he asked, "Is…is this _genuinely_ from…from Harry, Minerva?"

"You think I didn't think to test the signature and the origin?" asked Minerva, handing Albus a second piece of parchment, which he looked at with wider-than-wide eyes as he read the address on the letter.

_Mr H Potter_

_Room 1_

_Solitary Confinement,_

_St Michael's Maximum-Security Institute for Young Offenders_

_Cardiff_

_Wales_

"What…what is a…a Maximum-Security Institute?" asked Albus, looking up in fear and dread as he looked to Minerva.

"From…from what I…I heard from…from Charity," replied Minerva, her voice trembling with the same fear felt by Dumbledore, but for a completely-different reason, as she explained, "It…it is a…a place that…that Muggles use as…as a place similar to…to Azkaban! But…but from what…what she tells me, they…they _encourage_ young…young people to be sent here too!"

"What? Why?"

"I don't know," replied Minerva, her eyes filled with a mixture of tears of pain and dread, as well as a glimmer of anger that was aimed at Albus, simply because she knew, with both the address and the way the boy had replied to the invitation, that she had been right all those years ago.

Those Muggles were the worst sort of Muggles imaginable and _this_ proved it.

Albus, on the other hand, sighed softly before he looked up to Minerva as he told her, "No matter, if Harry wishes a more-personal invitation, I will be only too happy to indulge him, Minerva. But while I am gone, would you make sure nobody can find out about this? As far as anyone else is concerned, their saviour is happy and healthy living in a safe place provided by me."

Before Minerva could ask what in heaven's name the old man was thinking of doing, Albus grabbed Fawkes' tail feathers and flashed out of the office, leaving Minerva both alarmed and in a state of hope, as well as dread, at the thought of exactly who, or what, might be waiting for Mr Delirious on the other end of the phoenix.

Whatever it was, Minerva also knew this much.

She _really_ needed to have a word with Severus.

_**Blackout**_

"I must admit to some confusion upon receiving your request, Mr Dumbledore; in all the years he's been incarcerated here, 317 has never had so much as a family member come to visit him."

"317?" asked Dumbledore, the significance of the number – 31st day of the 7th month, aka _when the seventh month dies_ – not lost on him, even as he accompanied the head of staff at the _Institute_ where Fawkes had deposited him. All it had taken was a strong Compulsion Charm and his usual grandfatherly charm and he had been admitted in to see Harry.

However, the counsellor whom was in charge of said boy's case didn't seem fazed by the charm – either the magical one _or_ the air of one whom you could trust with your life – as she explained in a stern tone, "When they are as high-risk as this one, we do the world a favour and take out the need for names; instead, they are given a number best associated with the case. In _his_ case, 317 was chosen because it was the only thing we found with him: his date of birth. As for his name…well, it _is_ one he accepts, naturally, but he's been in and out of places like this so many times before that…well, you'll see for yourself."

As they stopped outside an ordinary-looking, but reinforced door, Dumbledore watched as the woman punched in a series of numbers on an unusual Muggle device that reminded him of what they called a _cal-queue-later_ or something like that, before the door buzzed, admitting both the stern woman and Albus himself into the room beyond.

"317, you have a visitor."

"Well, I hardly thought he was selling vacuum cleaners, door-to-door, Agatha," drawled an icy-cold voice from beyond the door, the sound of which made Albus' blood run cold as he stepped into the room, alongside the woman named Agatha, who didn't show any reactions to the jibe.

Instead, she listened as Albus addressed the speaker, though not without sensing a hint of déjà vu in the case of the old man as he remarked, "How do you do, Harry? I am Albus Dumbledore and I have come in response to your…requested meeting."

"Good," scoffed the boy in the room, earning a shudder from Albus as he saw nothing, but a lone figure standing by a mirrored wall, which didn't seem all that impressive. However, with the mirrored surface where it was, Albus could see exactly who and what he was dealing with, though he couldn't help but shiver as he took in the sight of the Magical World's saviour.

Instead of someone who could have been described as a double of James Potter, what he got was a pale-skinned youth with _very_ short-trimmed hair, which left nothing, but peppered black across his head instead of wild, long, shaggy hair. His facial structure was gaunt and, dare he think it, sickly-looking with a series of what looked like pockmarked spots here and there. However, the most-alarming feature about the boy's face was the lightning-bolt scar.

And Albus wasn't talking about the one that was known by every witch and wizard in Britain, and was also visible on his forehead.

No, he meant the _other_ lightning-bolt scar, which looked like it had been cut across his right eye, the middle of the bolt cutting almost-cleanly, but painfully through his eyelids while both points of the bolt stuck out above and below in perfect formation. He also had a second scar, which looked like it had been branded into his skin, just visible above his collarbone, which was shaped like a wolf's head, though the meaning was lost on Albus.

As well as his frightening facial features, the boy wore a single, one-piece outfit in pale-white with flecks and stains of red that made Albus' blood run cold, as well as a large, black bracelet of some sort on his right hand, which beeped steadily, even as the boy held his hands behind his back.

He was barefooted with short-cut nails and, curiously, what looked like a streak of black along his right ankle, though, before Albus could ask what had happened to this young man, he found himself returning to the boy's face as his charge addressed him again.

"So, are you going to get down on your knees willingly or do I have to break your kneecaps and _make_ you kneel, you murdering old cunt?"

"There's no need to be rude," argued Agatha, earning a snort from 317, aka Harry James Potter, as he turned to the woman.

"Aggie, you can go now. I think you've got another ass that needs kissing, so do me a favour and piss off before I make you! Which reminds me: how's that daughter of yours? Still breathing?"

For the first time since meeting the woman and working his own magic on her, Albus saw her stern demeanour collapse as she flinched and paled in alarm before she turned and, muttering something about there being a panic button – _whatever that was,_ as Albus thought – on the wall next to the door, she left much quicker than she'd entered.

As for Harry, he leaned against the mirrored wall behind him before he folded his arms, smiling smugly as he asked, "Well, old bastard: what's it to be? The easy way or the fun way? Either way, you're only going to get me in your little game of pissing up the wall with the rest of your fucked-up society by getting down on your knees and begging, so feel free to take as long as you need to decide."

"I'm sorry, Harry," said Albus, rounding on Harry as he told the boy, "But, clearly, this is for your own good."

With that, he launched a red flash at Harry…

Before the flash hit him, however, Harry's eyes – which reminded Albus of the colour of the Killing Curse more than the curse itself could – lit up and, to Dumbledore's alarm, what could only be described as an aura of _black_ _lightning_ enveloped Harry, making the lights in the room flicker while, behind Albus, the door he'd entered suddenly _locked_, leaving Albus alone in the room with Harry, who smiled with a predatory gleam before he rose up, standing tall, proud and malefic before Dumbledore as he shook his head.

"Now, now, Albus: forgive _me,_ old twat, but did you _honestly_ expect me to be as naïve and powerless as the rest of these Muggles? I knew you were pathetically-stupid-gone-senile, but I _never_ took you for the suicidal type as well."

"Harry…what…what happened to…" Albus began, but before he could finish, his eyes widened with horror, disbelief and no small amount of awed terror when he saw Harry's emerald-green eyes turn black, which then crackled and sparked like lightning, just as his body did the same, filling the room with more magic than ever.

"Last chance, Albus: _beg_ me to come to school! If not, then I guess you'll be seeing my folks _long_ before I do, so tell them I say hi."

Albus shakily lifted the Elder Wand, earning a scoff from Harry, "Sorry, but is that piece of wood supposed to frighten me?"

Before Dumbledore could reply, Harry lifted his own hand, which caused a bolt of black lightning to fly through the air and collide with Dumbledore's wand, sending waves of numbing, but also painful shocks through Dumbledore's hand.

As soon as he dropped the wand, however, even Dumbledore was shocked when a second, much-louder crack of thunder filled the air, followed by a shriek that made even Fawkes' most-alarming cries seem tame by comparison.

As Dumbledore watched, the Elder Wand _snapped_ right down the middle before, to the shock of both magic users, what looked like a pair of black wings rose from the middle of the wand, accompanied by a sleek, beautiful-looking body, a beaked head and a pair of greener-than-green eyes, which glared at Harry, not with hatred or challenge, but submission.

"What…what is this magic?" asked Dumbledore.

Rather than answer, however, Harry lowered his hands before, to Albus' alarm, his electrified body became pale, calm and surprisingly-normal looking, save for his scars and his pale, short-haired looks.

He also seemed to be _smiling,_ even as the black-feathered bird – which _looked_ like a phoenix, but was not like any phoenix Dumbledore had seen before – flew over to him before it perched itself on Harry's shoulder, where it nipped his ear and even nuzzled the scar on his face.

Harry, meanwhile, petted the bird once before, looking to Albus, he told him, "All right, I've changed my mind."

"W-W-W-What?"

"I'm coming to Hogwarts, old fucker," drawled Harry, stepping past Albus before, to the old man's shock, he laid his hand on the door, which caused a bolt of lightning to pass through the door and into the panel outside, unlocking the door for Albus, even as Harry added, "But, just so you know, I'm not coming to be a hero, or your little sheep…well, maybe a baa-baa, black sheep…_baa!_ But definitely not one of your little yes-men."

"Then, if I may ask, _why_ are you coming?" asked Albus, earning a snort from Harry as he looked to the old man with a mocking sneer.

"Because it's the only place that I _can_ go where I might find someone who'll stand up to me when I threaten to kill them…oh, and because I'm bored, but you should be pleased, Albus Dumbledore."

"Why is that?"

"Well," drawled Harry, a note of raw mockery and disrespect in his voice as he shrugged ruefully before, reaching up to pet his new companion, he smiled wolfishly at Dumbledore, even as sparks of black lightning danced through his eyes as he went on.

"Look at it this way; now you don't have to beg me, you've given me a reason to postpone ripping your head off and sticking it up your own ass for what you did to my parents. So, be happy, old man; you've got one more day alive on Planet Earth."

**Yikes, talk about the worst-possible beginning for Albus' plans to try and control the Boy-Who-Lived, but I'm sure we're all wondering exactly how Harry became nothing more than a number in a mirrored cell?**

**Also, where and how is it he has power equivalent to that of the Gods of Thunder from **_**every**_** pantheon put together and then some?**

**And what could have convinced him to change his mind so easily? Is it something to do with the bird he now has, or is it just a case of him gone off the deep end, so he changes his mind faster than the weather changes?**

**Keep Reading to Find Out**

**Next Chapter: Albus needs answers and, in order to get them, he needs someone who won't be intimidated by Harry…but who would be insane enough to go straight into the den of a thunder dragon who has been tickled every day for nearly ten years, just to appease Albus Dumbledore's one-sided curiosity?**

**Please Read and Review**

_**AN: Harry's new companion**_

**Also, weird thought here, but when writing up the idea of the bird that emerged from the Elder Wand, my first thought was a black version of the Phoenix Force's phoenix form from the X-Men Animated Series.**

**Scary? Maybe; weird? Definitely; do I care? Nope.**

**Oh, and just so you know, this bird **_**isn't**_** a phoenix, per se, but keep reading to find out what I have planned…or some of you might even figure it out, in which case, enjoy.**


	2. Harry's Philosophy

Blackout

**Disclaimer/Plot/Author's Note: **SEE FIRST CHAPTER

**Dedication: **I'd like to dedicate this story to my friends, fans and fellow Darksiders: my recommended reads are _Harry Potter and the Revival of Soul Magic, Harry Potter: Birth of Technomancy_ and _The Court of Shadows_ by AlphaPheonix, _When the Thunder Breaks_ by WeLonelyOldSouls, _The Downward Spiral Saga_ by BolshevikMuppet99, _Damaged Raven_ and _Dark Lord Potter_ by JustBored21, _Harry Is A Dragon, And That's Okay_ by Saphroneth, _Harry Potter and The Ashes of Chaos_ by ACI100, _The Dark Lord Peverell-Slytherin_ by Ares Peverell-Slytherin, _Yield to the Darkness_ and _Just A Touch of Kleptomania_ by Quatermass, _Dark Lord Potter_ by loverofeevee and _Path to Power_ by sirius009

**Key Pairing: **Harry/Harem

**Other Pairings: **To be determined

Normal Speech

'Thoughts'

'_Mental Speech_'

/_Parseltongue_/

**Review Answers:**

**Khatix: Oh, don't worry, Slytherin is **_**definitely**_** off the table for Houses in this story: in fact, let's just say there's a reason it's labelled Horror, apart from Harry's less-than-humane thoughts and ideals**

**JustBored21: I know, I got it and I REALLY appreciate everything you said in the PM, as well as you showing your own support and hopes for this adventure: I only hope I can give you an adventure to enjoy reading as much as I enjoy reading yours**

**WhiteElfElder: Hmm…do you think so? I think she'd probably look at him and want to adopt him…ooh…now there's a scary thought: sorry, did I say scary?**

_**Blackout**_

**ALSO: ****A special thanks to 'JustBored21' for offering me some words of advice on how to make this story truly interesting and fun: I admit, a lot of the themes to come in this story are inspired by this author's FANTASTIC Dark-Harry story "Damaged Raven" but any similarities are just a coincidence.**

**Even so, if you love Dark-Harry, I seriously recommend this intense adventure and really fun twist on Harry's time at Hogwarts and the crazy, fun and dark surprises that rise up throughout.**

_**Blackout**_

**Next Point: Harry's appearance**

**His actual appearance is mostly-inspired by Daniel Radcliffe in Imperium while the wolf 'scar/brand/tattoo' he has on his collar looks like the wolf's head symbol of The Witcher from the hit game/book/TV series**

**So, I hope this helps you imagine how he looks**

"_Well," drawled Harry, a note of raw mockery and disrespect in his voice as he shrugged ruefully before, reaching up to pet his new companion, he smiled wolfishly at Dumbledore, even as sparks of black lightning danced through his eyes as he went on. _

"_Look at it this way; now you don't have to beg me, you've given me a reason to postpone ripping your head off and sticking it up your own ass for what you did to my parents. So, be happy, old man; you've got one more day alive on Planet Earth."_

Chapter 2: Harry's Philosophy

The next time the boy known as Harry James Potter, alias 317, found his solitude disturbed, it was the day of his eleventh birthday and, once again, his _custodian_ only stayed for a minute – 90 seconds at the most – before Harry's presence frightened her away again, leaving Harry alone with the one whom he assumed _must_ have drawn the short straw with Dumbledore's plans.

Before him, there was a pale-looking gentleman dressed in what looked like a formal-looking coat, beneath which, he wore baggy, but comfortable clothes and, to Harry's curiosity, a purple turban on his head, which made him look like someone who'd come from the Orient, if not Asia. In one hand, the stranger carried a small bag, the sight of which made Harry frown, even as he looked back to the man's eyes, just in time to see a flicker of surprise cross the stranger's face before he composed himself as best as he could.

"M-M-M-Mr P-P-P-Potter?"

As soon as the stranger opened his mouth, Harry scoffed before, looking to his right, he asked, "Really? _This_ is the best, last, worst case scenario of a colleague the old bastard could send? I thought he'd be cleverer than sending someone who's not all he seems to be."

"W-W-W-W-W…" began the Professor, but before he could try and say anything else, Harry cut him off with a raised hand.

"Seriously? Just stop with the scratched CD treatment; your fake stammer's not fooling anyone, sir…well, it's not fooling _me_ anyway, but obviously, Albus Dumb-as-a-Dead-Dog's-Dung-Heap is the exception," drawled Harry, though, as he did so, the Professor's eyes widened with alarm and disbelief when he saw Harry's hand crackle, lighting up with black lightning bolts and an aura of pure magical power, which seemed to fill every inch of said boy's eyes as he faced the Professor again. "Mind you, if you want to see and have a _real_ stammer, then, please, Professor, by all means, _please_ keep trying to piss me off."

For a moment, the Professor seemed to be surprised, if not purely-awed by Harry's cold demeanour, as well as his ruthlessness and his lack of respect, let alone care for whatever was going on in front of him. At the same time, Harry himself frowned as he felt an air of dark magic fill the air that even made his new bird friend – whom was perched on the rail at the end of his cot/bed against the wall – draw herself up and take notice, even as the Professor cleared his throat before he addressed Harry.

"Interesting…and very perceptive of you, Mr Potter."

"Thank you," drawled Harry, though he did so in such a way that it told the teacher he didn't mean his thanks one little bit, even as he went on, "I suppose, now I can at least understand you, this is the part where we're supposed to come to some sort of arrangement for me to keep your secret in return for something _I_ want?"

"If you wouldn't mind," replied the Professor, earning a hum of disinterest from Harry as he walked over to his cot before, sitting down on the hard, uncomfortable mattress – it was solitary confinement, it wasn't supposed to be comfortable – he looked up at his companion as he considered this.

After a few minutes' personal contemplation, however, Harry smacked his lips together before, to the Professor's surprise, he _smiled _– albeit with the sort of smile that might make a shark smelling blood in the water seem preferable – as he remarked, "You know, the last time I said this to an adult, it was the twelfth of Never-ary; in fact, the only one I've _ever_ really said this to was someone on the cusp of adulthood and, even then, it was only because they deemed me worthy of _this._"

He tapped the wolf's head scar/brand/tattoo that Dumbledore had noticed on his collar, the sight of which earned a raised eyebrow from the Professor as Harry went on, "Mind, I don't know what it is about you, but you've earned the right to hear me say it to you, Prof."

"And what might that be?"

"I _like_ you," drawled Harry, earning another raised eyebrow from the Professor, even as Harry tapped the side of his head – the side that also had his scar cutting through his right eye – before he explained, "I _know_ you won't believe me, because you've been forced to work for an old clown with no dress sense and even less subtlety when it comes to not getting his own way, but I can _feel_ your power, sir…and, weird confession time, but it reminds me of my own."

"Is that so?" asked the Professor, earning a slow nod from Harry, even as the turban-wearing man asked, "So, am I right to assume that this _liking_ is enough for you to keep my secret, my young friend?"

"Well…in exchange for a favour that can and _will_ be called in whenever I feel it necessary," argued Harry, earning a surprised look from the Professor, even as Harry went on, "Oh, and the understanding that, if I even suspect you're out to threaten my future or that you're intending to use me for your own stupidly-retarded ambitions, I can and _will_ reveal your secret, no warning, no chance to escape and no mercy…deal?"

"My," retorted the Professor, smiling amusingly as he asked, "Do you realise just how _Slytherin_ you sound making such terms when, being you, you hold all the cards, Mr Potter?"

"_Duh,_" drawled Harry, leaning back against the wall next to his cot before he added, "Truth is: you have nothing I want or need _now,_ Professor, so, in the spirit of fair play, and because I like you, I'm willing to grant you a marker. Of course, if you fail to adhere to the terms of that marker when the time comes to cash it in, then…well…secret's out."

"Very well," agreed the Professor, nodding once before he added, "And, in the spirit of fairness, I suppose I _should_ introduce myself: I am Professor Quirinus Quirrell and, at Hogwarts, I will be your Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor."

"Wow," gasped Harry, mockery and pity evident in his voice as he asked, "How many times did you have to fuck up to get yourself demoted and stuck with such a dull-sounding teaching position?"

"You disapprove of defending yourself against the Darkest Magics, Mr Potter?" asked Professor Quirrell, earning a snort of amusement from Harry.

"If the way _Hogwarts_ does it is as dull and pacifistic as I fear it is, then fuck yeah," replied the young wizard, lifting his hand and creating his lightning again as he held it out for Quirrell to see. "Only weaklings _defend_ against the Dark, but those with the means to tap into true power? They have the means to make their _dark_ enemies beg for death and leave no room for pacifists, except as target practice."

"And, you really believe that, do you?" asked Quirrell, earning a nod from Harry.

"Everyone is in this life for themselves," argued Harry, earning another curious look from Quirrell, even as Harry pressed an electrified finger to his eye-scar, though he didn't even flinch, as he told the Professor, "If there's one thing this place has taught me, it is that…oh, and one other thing."

"What?"

"Something that I bet someone like _you_ would probably agree with," said Harry, smiling amusingly as he told Quirrell, "Thanks to this place, and others like it, and how fucked up I've come to see the world is, I've realised that, in the end, all that matters is how much power one has."

As he powered down his lightning again, Harry rose up while he chuckled in a knowing manner as he explained, "You're either the most-powerful person in the room, or you're nothing."

"Interesting philosophy."

"Stick around long enough at Hogwarts and you'll get a chance to see it in action," argued Harry, turning to stroke the wings of his bird before he looked back to Quirrell as he asked, "So, I assume you've cast some sort of mind control over old Aggie to get her to let me out of my _cage_ for the day, am I right?"

"Yes."

"And I assume you'll be _pretending_ to be all scared, stammering and unintelligible when you're speaking?"

"Correct."

"And you want me to ignore that and focus on what I'm doing in…wherever we're going, yes?"

"Three-for-three," replied Quirrell, earning a snort from Harry as he shrugged ruefully.

"What the hell; I could use a laugh…so, let's be going, Prof."

_**Blackout**_

As he led Harry out of the Institute, however, Quirrell's eyes narrowed while, unbeknownst to Harry, his left eye twitched when he felt a dark presence wash over him, accompanied by a low, hissing voice that sounded strained, weak and barely able to hold on for any longer than the time it took to say his piece.

"_Keep him close, Quirinus…aid him when he asks…do NOT allow him to think you…his…enemy…_"

As the disembodied voice fell silent, Quirrell dipped his head in response, even as he guided Harry away from the Institute to a spot where they could safely transport themselves to Diagon Alley.

"I understand, Master."

**A short second chapter that not only answers our question from the previous one, but shows us a bit more of Harry's psyche, which seems to have attracted someone else's attention, but where will this lead?**

**Also, if Quirrell – aka someone we know and love/loathe – is escorting Harry, what might this mean for the theft attempt at Gringotts and the events leading to the 'trap' being set at Hogwarts?**

**Keep Reading to Find Out**

**Next Chapter: Harry Potter is coming to Hogwarts, but if you think he's your friend, you've got another thing…oh…hang on…what's this? Well, what do you know? It seems Mr Ruthless God of Thunder has an advocate, after all…huh, talk about strange;**

**Please Read and Review**


	3. Purple Rain

Blackout

**Disclaimer/Plot/Author's Note: **SEE FIRST CHAPTER

**Dedication: **I'd like to dedicate this story to my friends, fans and fellow Darksiders: my recommended reads are _Harry Potter and the Revival of Soul Magic, Harry Potter: Birth of Technomancy_ and _The Court of Shadows_ by AlphaPheonix, _When the Thunder Breaks_ by WeLonelyOldSouls, _The Downward Spiral Saga_ by BolshevikMuppet99, _Damaged Raven_ and _Dark Lord Potter_ by JustBored21, _Harry Is A Dragon, And That's Okay_ by Saphroneth, _Harry Potter and The Ashes of Chaos_ by ACI100, _The Dark Lord Peverell-Slytherin_ by Ares Peverell-Slytherin, _Yield to the Darkness_ and _Just A Touch of Kleptomania_ by Quatermass, _Dark Lord Potter_ by loverofeevee and _Path to Power_ by sirius009

**Key Pairing: **Harry/Harem

**Other Pairings: **To be determined

Normal Speech

'Thoughts'

'_Mental Speech_'

/_Parseltongue_/

**Review Answers:**

**HMRoberts: I think the motto of this is: **_**be afraid, be VERY afraid,**_** wouldn't you agree, friend?**

**WhiteElfElder: You'd have to be as broken as he is and crazier than crazy can get to want anything to do with him…hmm…now who do we know like that, I wonder?**

**JustBored21: Your constant support is appreciated: now, get ready for a fun twist to the norm**

"_You're either the most-powerful person in the room, or you're nothing."_

Chapter 3: Purple Rain

At long last, after waiting for what seemed like _for-fucking-ever_ – as he put it – Harry was both amused and relieved to notice that September First had finally come around.

Thanks to his mysterious benefactor of a companion, Professor Quirrell, Harry was able to leave the Institute without any opposition from the backwards losers and weaklings who lived there and, again, thanks to Quirrell, he was also able to find his way to King's Cross Station by way of something called a Portkey.

_**Blackout**_

This also meant Harry missed out on a not-such-a-convenient meeting with a bunch of redheads who, to him, were nothing more than flame-tipped lightning rods who should probably be thankful they had a little while longer to live and breathe with their betters.

_**Blackout**_

As for Harry, he just made his way onto the train and, finding the first empty compartment, he sank down into his seat and waited for the start of the ride to begin. As he waited, Harry sighed softly before, reaching into his coat pocket, he pulled out a Walkman that he had _borrowed_ from its rightful owner and, conveniently, forgotten to return.

Igniting the system with a spark from the tip of his index finger, Harry let himself get lost in the ear-bleeding screeches, loud and heavy musical sounds of his favourite rock ballads, though not before he also closed his eyes, because, in all honesty, he couldn't be bothered playing nice with anyone he didn't want to see.

And since the only people he knew in this ass-backwards world were a fool and an interesting, if fraudulent, soul, it meant everyone else was someone Harry didn't want to see.

When the train finally pulled out of King's Cross, the slight jarring motion annoyed Harry, but he let his annoyances slip away as he continued to drown out the rest of the world with the sounds of Queen filling his ears.

As the music changed to one of Harry's favourite hits – _Killer Queen_ – the brief silence between the lines and lyrics gave Harry just cause to open his eyes when he heard the door to his compartment open.

Just as the chorus started up, Harry cocked an eyebrow when he saw a light-brown head of hair poke its way into the compartment, though when the owner of the hair saw him sitting there, he saw a pair of cool, blue eyes widen in disbelief before, over the chorus of Killer Queen, Harry heard a voice address him. "M…M…M…Master?"

Smiling in response, for perhaps the first time since meeting his _interesting_ companion, Professor Quirrell, Harry lifted a finger, using his spark to turn off his music before he chuckled softly as he drawled, "Now, Lavender; what was our one rule?"

Hearing the cold playfulness in his voice, the girl blushed before she told him, "Don't call you that where others can hear me."

"That's right," said Harry, rising from his seat before he reached out and, without waiting for an invitation, he dragged Lavender into the compartment, shutting it behind her as he asked, "And, I know it's been nearly two years since they stupidly decided to take you away from our home, my girl, but do you remember how long I was to punish you for if you broke our one rule?"

"As…as…as long as you wish to punish me, Ma…um…Harry," replied Lavender; however, had anyone _other than_ Harry seen or heard her odd way of responding to him, they would have been a little alarmed, if not scared to notice the girl seemed to be fighting back the urge to smile, as though she was looking forwards to her _punishment_ from Harry.

"That's right," agreed Harry, sitting down on the seat once again before he smiled as he asked, "But since this _is_ our first reunion in all this time, I think I'll be lenient with you, my little flower-child: what do you think about that?"

"I think…I want…I hope…"

Harry couldn't help but widen his smile, until it could have made The Grinch, if not the Cheshire Cat look tame and normal by comparison, even as he sighed softly before he told her, "Go on, Lavender; you can tell Master the truth."

"I _want_ you to punish me, Master!" gasped Lavender, though not before her hands flew to her mouth as her eyes widened in fearful excitement, the sight of which would have flat-out terrified mere mortals, even as Harry chuckled softly before he lifted an arm and held it out invitingly.

This was a movement that seemed acceptable to the brunette as she squealed with almost-maniacal glee before she moved to his lap, curling up like a cat in her master's lap, allowing him to stroke her long, curly hair, even as he told her, "_There's_ my little Harley: for a moment there, I feared the Muggles had made you _normal_, my poisonous pretty."

"_Nothing_ can make me normal, not since you claimed me as yours, Master," argued Lavender, though not before she giggled playfully as she asked, "Did…did you just call me your Harley? You…you still think of me as being just like her, do you…_Puddin?_"

"Isn't that what we agreed when we made our one rule, my little one?" asked Harry, igniting his fingertips almost-intentionally, earning a playful shudder from Lavender as she felt his power spark up and numb most of her body, sending tingles through her nervous system while every muscle in her body screamed for mercy.

Screams that _didn't_ go echoed by the brunette, even as Harry went on, "I let you be as broken, twisted and brilliant as those feckless freaks tried to insist you _weren't,_ and, in return, you only call me Master when we're alone, otherwise you are mine to do with as I please, which was okay in your book because you wanted it _so_ badly, didn't you, Lavender?"

"I still do," groaned Lavender, nuzzling against Harry's chest as she told him, "When they took me away, claiming I was…_sane,_ I…I missed you _so_ much, Master. I missed what you awoke in me and all the freedom you gave me, even when you were just using me as your pet. I missed all our talks, including what I knew of you and how you were who you were."

"The _best_ little slumber party in solitary I'd ever had," drawled Harry, stopping his ministrations, even as he asked, "Which, I suppose, leads me to my next question: obviously, we both knew you and I were witch and wizard, my Lavender, but with your parents dead and your home in ashes, who, _exactly,_ decided to rescue you from your new home…and take you from me at the same time?"

"You'll never believe it," insisted Lavender, earning an inviting gesture from Harry, even as the brunette told him, "It was some pig-ignorant, love-and-harmony, hippy-dippy aunt who had a Squib daughter already and decided to look me up when I got the all-clear. Every day was all peace-this, love-that, forgiveness-the-other and all that bullshit!"

"You should have just killed them," argued Harry, earning a soft giggle from Lavender.

"What? And spoil the fun for my Master? Not on your life," argued Lavender, moving to sit next to Harry as she rested her head on his shoulder before she added, "I _knew_ it was only a matter of time before my Hogwarts letter came, which meant yours would too and _then,_ my love, we would be reunited and I could be of use to you again. And, as proof of my willingness to surrender _everything_ to you, I would…I _do_ offer you the lives, blood and souls of my flower-child relatives and the Squib who _actually_ thinks she doesn't need magic to be a _real_ woman! So please, my love…my lord…my Harry; please say you'll take them?"

"Only if you will join me," argued Harry, earning an excitable giggle from Lavender, before Harry smiled softly as he added, "Also, when we get to Hogwarts, I _forbid_ you from calling me your Master, no matter what House we're in. We don't need to waste time and oxygen arguing about ethics and lives and friendships with these narrow-minded bastards with a retarded sense of morality. So, be my Harley again if you _want_ to be, but I flat-out forbid you from calling me Master: I neither want nor need the attention of these dicks, you got that?"

"I do…Harry," replied Lavender, shuffling awkwardly before she asked, "So…can we go back to doing it again? Please?"

"Lie down."

As Lavender squealed in response, she lay her head in Harry's lap while the young sorcerer ignited his hand, allowing black lightning to dance over his skin, while he began gently rubbing electrified circles into Lavender's body. And while her body twitched and jerked from the sensual, if painful touch, the young girl with the _Harley-Quinn-esque_ mindset – hence why Harry called her what he did – only sighed contentedly as she felt her mind, body and spirit succumb to the dominant force of a power she had spent many a moon missing.

But now, she was back.

And she was his.

And he was her Master, even if she couldn't say it.

And that was worth all the shocks, pain, torture and agony that any amount of magic could dish out.

Especially _his._

_**Blackout**_

Almost an hour later, Harry tensed up suddenly, earning a gasp from Lavender when they heard the door open, admitting someone who was far from welcome, as their rude interruption showed and their voice proved.

"Oi! Have either of you two weirdoes seen Harry Potter? I'm looking for him and…"

Before the rude, ignorant annoyance could finish, Harry lifted his free hand and sent a bolt of black lightning flying towards the intruder, sending him flying out of the compartment, which resulted in his body skidding along the floor in such a painful way, it left a deep, reddish-coloured graze right up the side of his cheek.

Back in the compartment, Lavender opened one eye before she asked, "Who _was_ that, Harry?"

"Just an insect that needs to be squashed, but I settled for swatting it away for now," replied Harry, returning to his gentle, if slightly-strange manner of caressing Lavender's flesh with an electrified hand.

As she let out a series of moans and content sighs at the effect that Harry's power was having on her, Lavender drew in a slow breath before she asked him, "Why didn't you just kill the bug if it was bothering you so much?"

"Rule Two."

If Lavender's casual method of closing her eyes and allowing her body to once again gladly, if somewhat-painfully submit to the empowered touch of her master's true power was any indication, this seemed to be the only answer Harry needed to give.

_**Blackout**_

"Has anyone seen a toad?"

"Have you tried looking in the mirror?" asked Harry, opening his eyes again, while he silently cursed himself for forgetting to make absolutely certain that neither him nor Lavender would be disturbed again, after the fun dismissal he'd given the last insect who dared bother them.

When he saw another messy-haired brunette who looked _nothing_ like his beloved Harley of a witch, Harry frowned as he asked, "Or is the warty creature just nestled in that abomination you call hair?"

"There's no need to be rude."

"Kettle, Pot, come in, Pot," drawled Harry, nudging Lavender before he rose from his seat, earning a slightly-worried, but more-excited look from his companion as he squared up to the brunette before he told her, "Now, since you're all for being a voyeur and sticking your oar in where it doesn't belong, how about you send a message to the rest of the rude freaks on this rickety old steamer?"

While the girl's eyes widened in horror at the sight of Harry's features so up close and personal, Harry lifted his hand before he smiled wolfishly as he added, "Here, let me write it down for you."

_**Blackout**_

Seconds later, an ear-piercing scream tore through the Hogwarts Express, alarming many of the occupants of other compartments while leaving the Prefects in a state of confusion, disbelief and, in the case of one of them, annoyance at how these ingrates seemed to be ignoring the most-basic rule of all.

Keep the noise down and the Prefects wouldn't have to bother you.

"Well?" asked Percy Weasley, gesturing towards the source of the scream, "Isn't anyone going to check that out?"

"So much for Gryffindor bravery," sneered Marcus Flint, leaving the Prefects' compartment while he added, "I pity your House, Weaselby."

_**Blackout**_

"What a tragic waste."

"Of oxygen?"

"No, of my _time,_" drawled Harry, wafting a hand in front of his face to rid his compartment of the smell of faeces and burning flesh while he also turned to Lavender as he added, "But hopefully, now, these worms will leave me alone and I won't have to resort feeding them to my new friend."

"New friend?"

Before Harry could answer, a part of him then aware of how his favourite, and _only,_ friend in the entire world, not to mention a devout advocate who gladly gave him the means to feed the monster and tickle the sleeping dragon within him whenever he felt the urge – which _only_ happened on days ending in the letter Y – was unaware of the newest member of their crowd, he turned again when he heard the door open.

"All right, how about I make it a rule? The next dickhead to open this door without showing due decorum is going to find out what a still-beating heart looks like: is _that_ reason enough for you Light-worshipping, old-man-oral-treating dicks to leave me alone?"

"Wow," drawled a gruff, if somewhat-mature voice, earning a raised eyebrow from Harry as he added, "And here was I thinking that every first year on this train was one with no balls: just for that, I'm _sorry_ for intruding, but we heard a disturbance down the train and wondered if you knew anything about what caused it and why."

"I like this one," said Lavender, curling her knees to her chest, even as Harry turned to face a young man whom could only be described as a cross between a stone gargoyle and a troll in human skin; he was thickset, but with a definite air of danger about him that made Harry realise, almost-instantly, why Lavender liked this one.

He didn't say it aloud, but Harry could sympathise with that remark, even as he addressed the older student, "I caused the disturbance, but, in my defence, the pathetic Mudblood bitch who got in my way should have just kept walking when she had the chance."

"Mudblood, says you?" asked the troll-boy, earning a firm nod from Harry, even as the boy smirked before he asked, "All right, since you're not yet sorted, I can't _actually_ punish you and, obviously, if another student was causing trouble for two first-years who just wanted some peace and quiet, then she must have been in the wrong for trespassing and acting in a way that doesn't befit a _real_ student of the school."

"I couldn't agree more…Prefect?"

"Flint," said the boy, holding out a hand to Harry as he added, "Marcus Flint…and you would be?"

"John Smith and Jane Doe," drawled Harry, earning a barking laugh from Lavender while even Flint smiled with a mixture of curiosity and amusement as he released Harry's hand.

"Why do I get the feeling those aren't your real names?"

"Because they're not, but you'll find out who we are at the Sorting, Flint," said Harry, stepping back into the compartment before he added, "Now, if you'll excuse us, all this excitement has left me a little tired, so I think I'll have a nap before the train reaches the end."

Marcus Flint left pretty quickly, though not before he smiled to himself as he thought about the boy he'd just met.

Ruthless.

Blood-supreme.

Merciless.

Uncaring of authority or the ideas of anyone other than him and his young female friend.

If that guy didn't get into Slytherin House, Marcus would eat his badge.

**Chapter 3 and, wow, talk about an advocate to be feared and respected, but is Mr Flint right about Harry's fate lying with the snakes?**

**Also, I'm sure you're all wondering: what **_**message**_** did Harry leave with the insufferable know-it-all and what about the weasel?**

**Keep Reading to Find Out**

**Next Chapter: The Sorting gets put on hold when Harry is made to remember just where he is: but if you think you intimidate him, Hogwarts, here's two words for you: **_**try harder!**_

**Please Read and Review**

_**AN: Lavender**_

**So, admittedly, I had a bit of a mass choice about who Harry would have as an advocate and, in the end, I had a bit of fun deciding to use a less-known, but still-popular character and give her a serious makeover.**

**Enter Lavender Brown: someone who is usually bashed or shoved aside, now centre-stage with Harry.**

**Also, as it says, her relationship with him is more like Harley and Joker – which I find appropriate, given where Harry grew up – so if this sort of thing displeases you, I kindly advise you to stop reading now, especially since there **_**will**_** be 'punishment' scenes at certain points in the story and scary, weird themes throughout.**

**Also, in case you missed it, Lavender is one of the girls Harry will end up with: in fact, she takes centre-stage in the relationship, even though I have a plan about what actually brings the others into it, but keep reading to find out what I have planned.**

**Finally, I'm using the actress who portrayed her in HBP/DH for Lavender, so that's who you should imagine and, again, if the way I write her and Harry in this isn't for you, then, again, remember: don't like, don't read.**

**Such is the fun of Fanfiction.**


	4. I Remember, I Just Don't Care

Blackout

**Disclaimer/Plot/Author's Note: **SEE FIRST CHAPTER

**Dedication: **I'd like to dedicate this story to my friends, fans and fellow Darksiders: my recommended reads are _Harry Potter and the Revival of Soul Magic, Harry Potter: Birth of Technomancy_ and _The Court of Shadows_ by AlphaPheonix, _When the Thunder Breaks_ by WeLonelyOldSouls, _The Downward Spiral Saga_ by BolshevikMuppet99, _Damaged Raven_ and _Dark Lord Potter_ by JustBored21, _Harry Is A Dragon, And That's Okay_ by Saphroneth, _Harry Potter and The Ashes of Chaos_ by ACI100, _The Dark Lord Peverell-Slytherin_ by Ares Peverell-Slytherin, _Yield to the Darkness_ and _Just A Touch of Kleptomania_ by Quatermass, _Dark Lord Potter_ by loverofeevee and _Path to Power_ by sirius009

**Key Pairing: **Harry/Harem

**Other Pairings: **To be determined

Normal Speech

'Thoughts'

'_Mental Speech_'

/_Parseltongue_/

**Review Answers:**

**DS2010: Appropriate, no?**

**Jostanos: Lavender is a sort of purplish colour, right?**

**GaryDoom: Nah, I prefer to call it making him what they turned him into and it's not a naïve little boy who keeps his head down**

**JustBored21: Hope you enjoy it, then**

**Chaos Snow Kitsune: Exactly why I chose her…oh, but don't worry: your favourite will get an appearance soon**

_Marcus Flint left pretty quickly, though not before he smiled to himself as he thought about the boy he'd just met._

_Ruthless. Blood-supreme. Merciless. Uncaring of authority or the ideas of anyone other than him and his young female friend._

_If that guy didn't get into Slytherin House, Marcus would eat his badge._

Chapter 4: I Remember, I Just Don't Care

Thankfully, or perhaps mercifully, Harry and Lavender were left alone for the remainder of the trip to Hogwarts.

However, when they changed into their robes and left the train, only to be greeted by a loud voice that seemed to get on Harry's nerves as soon as he opened his mouth, Lavender was quick to take her dear friend's hand and squeeze it tightly before, as they followed the source of the voice, and their fellow first-years, in the direction they were heading, the brunette leaned in close.

"Don't let them win, Harry. If you really want to, you can take your anger out on _me_ later, I promise."

Squeezing her hand in response, Harry sent a jolt of lightning through his fingers, making Lavender coo in anticipation as she rested her head on his shoulder, even as they continued walking behind the giant and the crowd of first-years. When the first-years reached the edge of a large lake that seemed to be the _only_ way across to the school, Harry scowled again before, deciding to ignore his ire, if only for now, he pushed his way through the crowd and slammed himself down in one of the boats.

For added emphasis, he laid himself along the seats in the boat, prompting Lavender to do the same, even as a familiar annoying redhead asked him, "Oi! Come on, let me sit with you!"

"Go fuck yourself," drawled Harry, earning a titter from Lavender while the redhead fumed.

"Then how am I supposed to get across?"

"You can swim, can't you?"

"Hey now!" exclaimed the giant who'd screamed for all of Scotland to hear earlier, now prompting Harry to turn his head in the direction of the voice as the large thing added, "Everyone gets a seat: we don't go over the lake until everyone's in."

"Then I guess we're not going," drawled Harry, resting his hands behind his head for emphasis, even as he asked, "Besides, if everyone is meant to get across and there's no more than four to a boat, I don't see why this annoying insect can't go and buzz in somebody else's ear. Or is the student body an exact multiple of four or something?"

While many first-years looked confused and even disbelieving at Harry's cavalier response, the giant wasn't as appeased, "Sit up properly and let him join you or I'll report you to Professor Dumbledore!"

"You mean the old bastard who wants me here to appease his own paedophilic tendencies?" asked Harry, earning gasps of horror from a few of the first-years while, to Harry's amusement, the giant suddenly fumed, seemingly growing larger as he moved away from his own boat before he aimed a silly pink umbrella at Harry.

"_Never…insult…Albus Dumbledore…in front of…_"

"Bored now."

Before the giant could finish his threat, Harry lifted his hand, grabbing the pointy end of the pink umbrella before he sent a bolt of lightning running through it, incinerating the pink coverings of the umbrella while, to the alarm of the giant man, the wood was turned to nothing more than a pile of burned-up ashes, which seemed to sink to the bottom of the shallow end of the lake, even as Harry looked up to the large creature.

"Sorry…was that a very important umbrella? Oh dear, what a pity, never mind."

"What…have…you…_done?_" demanded the giant, earning a _ho-hum_ sort of sigh from Harry as he sat upright, but only so he could bend down and peer into the lake before, sniffing once, he looked to Lavender.

"Since we're not going anywhere, Lav, how do you fancy swimming?"

"In this cold weather? In water that's probably colder than Siberia and infected with Merlin-knows-what?" asked Lavender, though not before she surprised everyone else, as did Harry, when both of them started stripping off, right down to their birthday suits, before Lavender smiled coyly.

"I'll race you."

"Now wait…"

Before the giant could finish, Harry and Lavender had already dived into the water and started swimming off towards the far end, heading for Hogwarts while the rest of the first-year group was left high-and-dry…quite-literally.

"Well?" asked a blonde-haired boy whom Harry was yet to meet, not that he would have cared, as the blonde directed his words to the giant.

"What are you waiting for, you ignorant servant? Contact someone at the school and get us over there _now!_"

_**Blackout**_

"Merlin's beard!"

This was the first, if not only thing Professor Minerva McGonagall could bring herself to say when she saw not one, but two first-year students emerge from the lake, both of them as naked as the day they were born, one of them with a face that was seriously-scarred, as well as a wolf's head brand – or tattoo – on his collar while the other had her own fair share of scars along her yet-to-be-formed breasts, including a painful-looking scar cut across her lower stomach, just inches from her currently-hairless womanhood.

As the boy shook himself down, he coughed once as he asked, "Oh, so you'd be the person that oaf was going to pass us onto, are you? Well, if you're looking for him, he's still on the other side of the lake like an idiot because he _is_ an idiot who can't keep his big nose, or big mouth, out of my business…say, do you happen to have a spare robe? We left ours in the boats…oh, and you might need a mechanic."

"Do magical boats have mechanics?" asked the girl, earning a shrug from the boy before Minerva's eyes widened when she saw him wrap his arms around the brown-haired girl before, to her alarm, volts of lightning covered both their bodies, earning a content sigh from the young girl while her male companion coughed again.

"Ooh, Harry…are you catching a cold?"

"_Harry?_" asked Minerva, earning a blank, thousand-yard-stare-worthy look from the almost-bald-headed boy as he cocked his head to one side.

"What? You mean there's actually someone in this madhouse who _doesn't_ know me as soon as they see me? Phew, thank fuck for that: now, again, I ask: about that robe?"

"Wait here!" snapped Minerva, drawing her wand before, swishing it through the air, she aimed it at the other side of the lake as she commanded in a loud, almost-desperate voice, "_Carpe Retractum._"

"Guess that's a no to the mechanic or a lifeboat then, Lav," drawled Harry, ignoring Minerva's accusing glare, even as he looked to Lavender before he asked, "Well, at least we'll be able to get dressed in our own clothes again: beats standing out here in the nude like some sort of crazy person, don't you think, my girl?"

"I'd think it's worth it just to feel you warming me up, Harry," giggled Lavender, earning a shushing gesture from Harry, even as the boats finally caught up with the two students.

As the kids redressed themselves, Harry snorted in amusement when he heard the giant bawl like a big baby;

"Professor McGonagall, ma'am; that boy needs to be punished for breaking a teacher's property! He could've left us on the other side all night long!"

"There was a path, wasn't there?" asked Harry casually, closing his robe around him as he added, "Or did the rest of the school have to swim over here in their robes and pointy hats too? I do hope none of the older boys think with their other wands, because they'd probably find them having shrunk in the wash."

"Enough, Mr Potter!" spat Minerva, earning gasps of alarm from the rest of the first-years, while Harry groaned audibly.

"Well, fuck a duck and the cat that ate it…she _does_ know who I am. There goes my good mood."

_**Blackout**_

"Wait here! I will be back to deal with your rudeness and your actions against a teacher soon enough."

"_Jawohl,_" drawled Harry, giving a salute for added emphasis as he waited with Lavender in a spare room off the side of the Entrance Hall; while the rest of the first-years had been ushered into the Great Hall as soon as they'd arrived, the two students who'd braved the elements, and more, to do what they felt was the right thing – namely reaching the school – had been treated like criminals as they were dragged aside, put in an empty room and left there by McGonagall.

Once the old woman was gone, however, Harry frowned as he asked, "Lavender, I'm confused: she says we did something to a teacher, but who could she mean? She can't surely mean that oaf who's about as much a teacher _as_ _I am,_ can she?"

"Well, did you offend any other staff member?"

"Does old Dumbo Drawers count?"

"Nope."

"Then no."

"Then _no,_" agreed Lavender, earning a kiss to the forehead from Harry.

"That's what I thought…shall we?"

With that, they left the small room and, without so much as a word of warning or apology, the two students opened the doors to the Great Hall and sauntered in like they owned the place. When every other student in the hall looked to them in confused disbelief, Harry lifted his hand in a mocking wave as he smiled wolfishly at their dumb, stupid faces.

"Hi, everyone: nice to meet you, I don't think. Sorry we're late: it's a labyrinth out there."

"Mr Potter: I told you to wait outside!" insisted McGonagall, earning more gasps from the school, as well as those on the staff table, as the scarred, completely-different-looking boy was revealed to be who he really was.

"Oh, I know, McGoggles, I just don't much care," insisted Harry, earning an alarmed, outraged look from Minerva, while Harry pushed his way through the first-years as he added, "So, if you're done trying to be as intimidating as a raindrop on a window, how about you sort us and just get over yourself? Ooh, now would you look at that, Lavender? It's our little messenger from earlier."

As he said the last part, Harry pulled down a hood that had been concealing the face of the darker-haired brunette from before; when he did so, a gasp of horror and disbelief spread through the hall when they saw the brunette's face had been seriously-burned, judging by the redness of her left and right sides, both of which had thick, claw-like marks running up from her jawline to her ears. As for her wild brown hair, some of it had been burned off of her left side, leaving black patches at the base of the frizz that looked like real fire had been applied to her.

Seeing the burns, and the other wounds on the girl's face, Minerva looked back to Harry as she asked, "Mr Potter…are…did _you_ do this?"

"Yeah," said Harry in a matter-of-fact voice, earning more gasps from the students, even as he added, "But, in my defence, she _was_ annoying me, wasn't she, Lavender?"

"Yep."

"You…you _burned_ a…a girl's face because…because she annoyed you?" asked Minerva, horror now joining every other emotion she felt as she watched Harry stop at the front of the group.

"Is that not what I just said? Oh, and FYI, I didn't _burn_ her…I just left her with a nice reminder not to stick her oar in and act so high-and-mighty in front of her betters," said Harry, shrugging ruefully before he added, "Pretty basic stuff, really: anyway, can I be sorted now?"

"No!"

"Oh, okie-dokie," agreed Harry, looking from McGonagall to a white-faced Dumbledore as he added, "Well, this has been fun, Albie, but, as I said before, fuck you very much and, since your little bitch here won't do her job, just like her master, really. I guess this is goodbye…oh, and be sure to tell Voldemort I said hi when his boys and girls are _playing_ with these boys and girls."

With that, he turned and stepped back through the crowd…

"Minerva, sort him!"

"Aww, you could have at _least_ let me reach the door before you showed your hand, Dumbledore," argued Harry, sighing dramatically as he turned back before he added, "Wow, you must be _shite_ at poker with a face that terrible."

"Albus!" cried Minerva, indicating Harry as she added, "He…he attacked a student…"

"No, I silenced an annoyance."

"He should be expelled!"

"Ooh, now there's an idea," laughed Harry, even as Minerva rounded on him again while he added, "Yeah, nice idea, McGoogly-Eyes; expel a guy who doesn't know or _care_ whether insects like this Mudblood or weirdoes like your sheepdog in his golden kennel up there live or die. Wow, no wonder this is the best school of witchcraft and wizardry in the world: what do the others teach? Finger painting?"

"Harry, come and take your sorting," said Dumbledore, earning a shrug from Harry as he walked up to the Sorting Hat, ignoring the fact that he wasn't even meant to be called up until 75% of the rest of the first-years had been sorted, before he lifted the hat and set it over his head.

"So…let's time this, shall we? One dead body, two dead bodies, three dead bodies, four dead bodies, five dead bodies, six dead bodies, seven…"

"GRYFFINDOR!"

Dead silence filled the Great Hall, even as Harry removed the hat from his head before he threw it to Lavender, much to McGonagall's horror, as Harry moved to sit with the Gryffindors, many of whom – even the usually-fun-loving Weasley Twins – actually moved away from the scarred boy.

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"Lavender Brown, come on down!" called Harry dramatically, smiling like the cat that ate an entire city of canaries as he watched his dear friend sit next to him, where she seemed content to return her head to its place on Harry's shoulder, even as the emerald-eyed scion gestured to the horrified Head of Gryffindor House.

"Okay, McGonads…the important bit's over, so you can proceed with sorting the rabble…and hurry up, because I'm getting hungry."

**Chapter 4 and, do yourselves a favour guys, look out the window and tell me: can you see four horsemen on scary steeds?**

**No…hmm…maybe the Apocalypse hasn't quite begun yet, even though, for Gryffindor, McGonagall and even the old coot, it might as well have done, don't you think?**

**Keep Reading to Find Out**

**Next Chapter: Gryffindor House: a place where you respect a dick, pay homage to a manipulative prick and are expected to bend over and take it up the ass…hmm…how can I put this? **_**Be afraid, be VERY afraid, sheep! **_**You have a wolf in your midst…and he's **_**hungry!**_

**Please Read and Review**


	5. Be Prepared

Blackout

**Disclaimer/Plot/Author's Note: **SEE FIRST CHAPTER

**Dedication: **I'd like to dedicate this story to my friends, fans and fellow Darksiders: my recommended reads are _Harry Potter and the Revival of Soul Magic, Harry Potter: Birth of Technomancy_ and _The Court of Shadows_ by AlphaPheonix, _When the Thunder Breaks_ by WeLonelyOldSouls, _The Downward Spiral Saga_ by BolshevikMuppet99, _Damaged Raven_ and _Dark Lord Potter_ by JustBored21, _Harry Is A Dragon, And That's Okay_ by Saphroneth, _Harry Potter and The Ashes of Chaos_ by ACI100, _The Dark Lord Peverell-Slytherin_ by Ares Peverell-Slytherin, _Yield to the Darkness_ and _Just A Touch of Kleptomania_ by Quatermass, _Dark Lord Potter_ by loverofeevee and _Path to Power_ by sirius009

**Key Pairing: **Harry/Harem

**Other Pairings: **To be determined

Normal Speech

'Thoughts'

'_Mental Speech_'

/_Parseltongue_/

**Review Answers:**

**JammyASDFG: Wow, that's quite the leap of faith, friend: hope it pays off**

**Chaos Snow Kitsune: And this, as the famed saying goes, is only the beginning: the worst is yet to come**

**JustBored21: Oh, don't you worry, my dear friend: he's going to get plenty of opportunities: also, I have a nice, dark twist planned that starts in this story that I hope you enjoy**

"_Okay, McGonads…the important bit's over, so you can proceed with sorting the rabble…and hurry up, because I'm getting hungry."_

Chapter 5: Be Prepared

"Granger, Hermione!"

"Scarface," muttered Harry, ignoring the looks he was getting from the rest of Gryffindor House ever since he had become one of them: unlike his Lavender, the rest of the so-called _Brave House_ acted like gazelle cornered in the path of a hungry…no…_ravenous_ lion, who was determined to devour and disembowel them just to sate his hunger and because he was bored.

Right now, however, he watched with Lavender as the brunette whom Harry had used as a messenger he _wished_ had been shot gripped the hat tightly while her whole body trembled. At one point, Lavender even whispered to Harry how she was able to read the nuisance's lips and, from the sounds of things, she was _begging_ the hat not to do something.

Seconds later, Harry found out what that was when the Hat yelled, "GRYFFINDOR!"

"NO! PLEASE! ANYWHERE BUT THERE!" Screamed Granger, earning a snigger from Harry as he saw the brunette look to McGonagall before she pleaded, "Please, Professor, let…let me try again: please, it…it says in Hogwarts: A History…"

"Miss Granger, you cannot just demand a resort because you do not like the House you have been sorted into," argued a hook-nosed Professor, the sight of whom made Harry scowl as, whenever the man's gaze seemed to sweep over his, he actually looked constipated and seemed to be eyeing Harry like a vulture would eye bloody carrion.

As for the Granger girl, she turned before she gasped "But…but please: you…you can't allow a student to…to be with that _psycho!_ He…he'll kill us all! And if he doesn't, then that…that…"

"Excuse me."

Suddenly, even Minerva looked to the Gryffindor Table as Harry raised a hand with a bored, but also-curious look on his face as he told the terrified witch, "Just so you know, Miss _Granger,_ the only reason I left my message on you on the train was because you annoyed me. Also, just as a little warning, if you think my message was scary, then _please,_ by all means, tell everyone, including me, what you were about to call my Lavender. I promise you: you won't just wish you'd never met me; you'll wish you'd never been told you were a witch, you insufferable know-it-all."

His green eyes sparked up as he said the last part, earning a worried, alarmed gasp from Hermione, even as Lavender cleared her throat and slid her arm around Harry's waist, as though her touch sought to calm him, as she added, "I think what Harry's _trying_ to say to you, just in case you don't speak anything, but Grangerican, whatever that is, is that, if you leave _us_ alone, you won't have a reason to be afraid of him…_or me._"

"Miss Brown," argued Professor McGonagall, her eyes filled with disbelief as she told Lavender, "We do _not_ take kindly to students threatening students or making cruel remarks."

"And yet you let the Marauders get away with it for seven years running, Professor McGoogoo," drawled Harry, earning an alarmed look from Minerva while, behind her, Professor Severus Snape's eyes widened with disbelief and a small amount of ire at Harry's arrogance for casually mentioning his bastard Father's toadies and everything they had done to him.

Unfortunately, the self-delusional Potions Master _wasn't_ the point Harry as trying to make, as he proved as he added, "Also, just so you know, Matron, Lavender and I were raised in a place where threats…sorry, _promises_ of retribution were the only way you'd survive. As a friend of mine likes to say: the first thing you do when you enter a new environment is case the joint, find the biggest dog in the yard and rip the bollocks off of him before making him your bitch. Then you make sure _everyone_ knows who the Alpha Male is: here's a hint for the rest of you. He's the guy with the lightning bolts on his face."

"20 points from Gryffindor for crass language and insulting a teacher!"

"Why not make it two hundred? See if I actually flinch," drawled Harry, earning more alarmed looks from the Gryffindors while Harry sighed softly as he added, "As for you, Granger; we gave you terms. Now, you have a choice: come and sit down and be a good, _quiet_ little rat's nest wearer or, with all due respect to the _greatest school in the world,_ fuck off out those doors and let us get on with the boredom."

"For once, I agree with Mr Potter," said Snape, earning a scoff from Harry, even as the Potions Master added, "Miss Granger: you have been sorted and have no just cause to be resorted, so go and take your seat with the Gryffindors. Or, if you think you're above the rest of us that you can't even manage a simple instruction without making a scene, then go and wait in Professor McGonagall's office and we shall have the paperwork for your removal from Hogwarts sorted by tonight."

"Now, Severus…"

"Oh, and now we hear from the organ grinder," drawled Harry, lifting a hand to his head as he added, "Well _ooo-aaah-aah-ooh…_and for those who don't speak monkey, I said: _what tune am I dancing to today, Master?_"

"Potter, show the headmaster some respect."

"Why? He knows what I think about him," said Harry, sniffing once before he asked, "Also, Mr Grease, I've got a question for you?"

"WHAT?"

To the alarm of the rest of the students, Harry ignited his hand, letting his lightning burn and crackle brightly as he asked Severus, "How _flammable_ is that hairstyle you seem to have coined for yourself? I'm curious: will one lightning strike be enough to ignite it or will you need a tempest?"

"Arrest him!"

"Send him to Azkaban!"

"Why is he even here?"

"Isn't _anyone_ going to tell him to stop?"

"_ENOUGH!_"

To Harry's amusement, Dumbledore looked like he was going to burst a blood vessel, while McGonagall looked somewhere between horrified and in a state of pure disbelief. Snape, meanwhile, was actually, visibly trembling – though whether with impotent rage or immeasurable levels of terror, Harry neither knew nor cared – as he stared at Harry, who looked to the Headmaster with the rest of the Great Hall's students as the old man cleared his throat, trying and failing to compose himself, as he addressed Harry.

"Mr Potter, _never_ in all my years in my role as Headmaster have I had to do this, but you leave me no choice: for constantly threatening to endanger your fellow students, I _forbid_ you from having anything to do with any extracurricular activities, including Hogsmeade visits and trying out for the Quidditch Team, while here at Hogwarts. Furthermore, as Headmaster, I remove _all_ the House Points from Gryffindor, so they start at _zero_ and, no matter what achievements you score, will remain at zero for the next _month!_"

"So…is that meant to be your idea of punishment, old man?" asked Harry, shrugging ruefully as he asked, "What? No waterboarding me? No Chinese water torture, thumbscrews or chains? Why not hang me by my ankles in the dungeons and leave me there all night long without food, water or the ability to upright myself?"

To the alarm of the students, the only one who laughed was Mr Filch, who earned a curious look from Harry while Lavender giggled softly as she told him, "I think you've just made a friend for life, my sweet."

"Her master's interesting too," agreed Harry, earning a surprised look from Filch as, while Lavender had been referring to Filch himself, Harry had a thought that she meant Mrs Norris, who seemed to share in her master's humour at the cavalier remarks made by Harry, judging by the purring sound that she let out.

"You will also serve a full term's detention with Professor Snape, during which you will be made to do _whatever_ he wants you to do!"

"Oh, forced servitude? Well it's not hot irons, dehydration or heated rooms, but it's a start, I suppose," drawled Harry, earning an alarmed look from many of the Gryffindors, who clearly thought of dealing with Professor Snape for even one night alone was torture enough.

But, to Harry, it might as well be a holiday in Barbados where every day was nice and sunny.

And, judging by the gleeful look he sent the brat, Severus Snape must have thought Christmas had come early.

What a fool _he_ was going to find out he was.

_**Blackout**_

After Granger _finally_ decided that the _benevolent_ Albus Dumbledore had punished her tormentor enough, she actually dared to sit with the rest of the Gryffindors, albeit in a seat that was the furthest opposite end to where Harry and Lavender were sitting. Meanwhile, the Sorting continued and, when Harry's other little nuisance – Draco Malfoy – was sent to Slytherin, the only thing Harry did was scoff before, unseen by the teachers, he ignited his hand when Draco tried to sneer in a superior, _I'm-better-than-you_ manner.

Once the blonde was seated, Harry smiled when Lavender asked, "Biggest dog?"

"Yup," said Harry, looking to Lavender before he asked, "Do you want to help me tame this puppy, Lavender?"

"No, you have fun with _your_ pet, and I'll do the same with _mine,_" said Lavender, indicating the still-frightened-looking Granger, earning a soft laugh from Harry as she asked, "I mean, I _can_ have her as my own little _pet_ project, can't I, Harry?"

"What sort of love would I be if I denied my lady her puppy?" asked Harry, snaking an arm around Lavender's waist as he leaned in close before he added, "Just remember Rule Two, my sweet, and you can have as much fun with your pet as your demented little heart desires…mind you, if you manage to break her and convince her where her true place is, I _might_ give you a special treat too."

"Promise?"

"Would I lie to you?"

"Weasley, Ronald!"

"Oh, look, Harry, it's Bolt Boy," said Lavender, earning a scoff from Harry as he pointed past his beloved.

"Look at the table, Lavender: Bolt Boy has some _very_ similar looks to those two tasty-looking gents watching with bated breath and the one who looks like he sleeps with law books for pillows and a stick up his ass that has a nice sharp end to keep him constipated: ipso, facto, Mr _Weasley_ is going to be sorted into the beautifully-dull house of…"

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"And now, thanks to that bleeding-obvious point, I've got a little lion cub of my own to break," added Harry, offering Lavender a sly wink before he added, "Might as well have some fun now."

Turning to face the redhead, just as he reached the table, Harry smiled before he put on a surprisingly-convincing act as he exclaimed, "Ronald, buddy: listen, I want to say sorry about the little electrocution mix-up earlier. It's just, I was having a moment with my girl and, well, if I'd known we were going to be besties and bros here in the House of the Best, Gryffindor, I'd have let you stick around."

"You…you _would?_" asked Ron, earning a nod from Harry as he indicated the Slytherin Table.

"After seeing how dull and pathetic the likes of Draco Malfoy are, compared to _real_ wizards like you, what can I say? I know who my friends are, so, come…sit…and let's chat about our future, what do you say? Friends?"

He offered a hand to Ron.

He might as well have offered him a bloody steak, judging by how fast, hard and determined the redhead became when he gripped Harry's hand, shaking it firmly while he smiled smugly at Malfoy's outraged face as he saw the redhead shaking hands with a truly-merciless Harry Potter.

_**Blackout**_

However, the look he sent Harry could have been because of how Harry said _he_ was the pathetic one and Ron Weasley – _Weasley?_ – was the real wizard around here.

Either way, Draco chose to think that Harry Potter had just made a very stupid mistake that he was determined to see cost the ignorant freak everything he knew, loved and thought he could hold onto.

And he knew _just_ where to begin too.

_**Blackout**_

'Excellent; he's _actually_ letting someone in…and one of Molly's children too; maybe this can work in my favour.'

This was Dumbledore's thought as he brought the Sorting to an end and announced the start of the feast: with Harry in Gryffindor, whatever horrors he had been forced to endure would soon be forgotten. And, with the _care_ of someone like Molly on the horizon – whom Albus also hoped found a way to get the boy into her clutches and away from this dangerously-unhinged girl who _obviously_ was the reason for Harry being so dark – and the friendship of someone who could provide him with the perfect way to get back on track with Albus' plans, Harry would soon forget everything.

And then, when the time was right, Harry would fall and things would be exactly as they were meant to be.

_**Blackout**_

'What _are_ you up to, Harry Potter?'

Unbeknownst to the vessel he was forced to occupy, the twisted, deformed shade of Lord Voldemort observed the Sorting and everything that was happening through his slave's eyes, watching the boy he had ordered Quirrell to take care of, as best as he could, and look out for.

He watched him accept his place in Gryffindor, becoming someone whom presented himself as a force to be feared and, judging by that strange girl's reactions around him – which reminded him of Bellatrix, not that he'd admit it aloud – respected, even _worshipped_ for his ruthless aggression and the dark mindset that, if he were being honest with himself, Voldemort would have _probably_ seen as a member of Slytherin, not Gryffindor.

Hell, even Ravenclaw could have made sense, but no.

Harry Potter, the prodigal son returned, had gone to Gryffindor and now, alarmingly, he seemed willing to offer the hand of friendship to a blood traitor's spawn while ignoring and belittling Lucius' own flesh and blood. He also seemed willing to offer some breathing room to Mudbloods and other blood traitors who continued to disgrace the name wizard while, curiously, the only one who kept him somewhat in control was the girl.

But if he was as interesting as Voldemort had sensed when he'd told Quirrell to assist and protect him, why would he befriend a blood traitor?

Again, the Dark Lord's shadow asked himself the same question;

'What _are_ you up to, Harry Potter?'

**Chapter 5 and, oh boy, talk about going from bad to worse, and yet, at the same time, I find myself agreeing with Tom: what **_**is**_** Harry up to by going down a path that someone else would want him to go down?**

**Also, just how stupid a mistake is Draco setting himself up to make, especially if he thinks his target at getting back at Harry, whom I suspect has the initials LB, isn't someone who'll pass word to the sleeping dragon in the lions' den?**

**Keep Reading to Find Out**

**Next Chapter: Harry and Lavender tell it like it is, which leaves some lasting impressions on those they're forced to spend seven years in the company of; however, even before the night is done, Harry discovers someone else isn't willing to wait long before thinking they can actually frighten him into submission; as a wise woman once said: **_**you poor, unfortunate souls…**_

**Please Read and Review**


	6. Let the Games Begin

Blackout

**Disclaimer/Plot/Author's Note: **SEE FIRST CHAPTER

**Dedication: **I'd like to dedicate this story to my friends, fans and fellow Darksiders: my recommended reads are _Harry Potter and the Revival of Soul Magic, Harry Potter: Birth of Technomancy_ and _The Court of Shadows_ by AlphaPheonix, _When the Thunder Breaks_ by WeLonelyOldSouls, _The Downward Spiral Saga_ by BolshevikMuppet99, _Damaged Raven_ and _Dark Lord Potter_ by JustBored21, _Harry Is A Dragon, And That's Okay_ by Saphroneth, _Harry Potter and The Ashes of Chaos_ by ACI100, _The Dark Lord Peverell-Slytherin_ by Ares Peverell-Slytherin, _Yield to the Darkness_ and _Just A Touch of Kleptomania_ by Quatermass, _Dark Lord Potter_ by loverofeevee and _Path to Power_ by sirius009

**Key Pairing: **Harry/Harem

**Other Pairings: **To be determined

Normal Speech

'Thoughts'

'_Mental Speech_'

/_Parseltongue_/

**Review Answers:**

**WhiteElfElder: Draco's stupid move is on the list, but let's just say I'm saving it for the worst-possible time he could choose**

**Chaos Snow Kitsune: Don't worry, she will do **_**very**_** soon: oh, and you should know, she's canon age, which meant she graduated at the end of the term before Harry started at Hogwarts – and that's **_**real**_** canon: Tonks and Charlie Weasley both graduated in 1991 – so I think you might be able to figure out how I plan on bringing her in**

**JustBored21: One because he finds them interesting and the other out of self-preservation: as for after this year, that'd probably drop to just the one and, even then, again, it's out of self-preservation**

**Bartholomew Black: That's a funny idea, but it's not my plan: I just used the 'scarface' thing with Hermione in the same way canon Draco calls Harry 'scarhead'**

_Harry Potter, the prodigal son returned, had gone to Gryffindor and now, alarmingly, he seemed willing to offer the hand of friendship to a blood traitor's spawn while ignoring and belittling Lucius' own flesh and blood. He also seemed willing to offer some breathing room to Mudbloods and other blood traitors who continued to disgrace the name wizard while, curiously, the only one who kept him somewhat in control was the girl._

_But if he was as interesting as Voldemort had sensed when he'd told Quirrell to assist and protect him, why would he befriend a blood traitor?_

_Again, the Dark Lord's shadow asked himself the same question;_

'_What are you up to, Harry Potter?'_

Chapter 6: Let the Games Begin

"Oh! My stomach!"

"Want me to kiss it better?" asked Lavender, earning a snort of amusement from Harry as the Sorting Ceremony, and the feast that followed it, _finally_ ended. On the Gryffindor Table, Harry massaged his stomach, which felt hard and firm and a _little_ distended, suggesting he might have eaten more than he thought he could manage, even as he looked to Lavender before he winked at her.

"Save that for the bedroom, my girl."

"You…you mean?"

"What? We always used to share a bed before, right?"

"Yes."

"So why not now?"

As Lavender giggled in response, resting her head on her beloved's shoulder, Harry stifled a burp as he patted his full belly before he sighed softly as he asked, "So, the feast's over and done with: what's everyone waiting for? A telegram?"

"We need to wait for my brother to show us the way," replied Ron, earning a bored look from Harry.

"What? We can't just bugger off and enjoy the joys of getting lost? Where's the fun in that?"

Before Ron could finish, Harry's eyes drifted to the High Table when he heard Professor McGonagall tap her glass, earning a scoff from the rogue lion as he drawled, "Why not conjure up a hammer and gavel, Your Nibs? At least then, you'd make it much more-entertaining for those of us who wouldn't listen anyway."

"You _really_ don't like McGonagall, do you, Harry?"

"I don't like _almost_ anyone with the first name Professor, Ronald," argued Harry, earning a curious look from Ron, even as Harry indicated the High Table as he explained, "Obviously, I'm not so suicidal that I'd cross swords with a goblin who is also a teacher, and then there's our Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor, Professor Quirrell. You know, once you get over the garlic smell coming from his turban and the stammer, he's actually quite a decent bloke."

"I _like_ garlic," said Lavender, earning a chuckle from Harry.

"That's why I know you'll find him just as pleasant a company as I do, Lav," said Harry, stroking Lavender's hair between his fingers as he chuckled before he added in a humorous tone, "And don't you go falling asleep yet, my girl: the last thing we need is someone making a bitch-fest because I have to carry you like you're my newly-married bride and we're going up to the honeymoon suite."

"Mmm…promises, promises," mumbled Lavender, earning a snort from Harry.

"Yeah, but if you fall asleep, who's going to give me a belly rub just the way I like it? I'll be up all night with a bad stomach-ache at this rate!"

Lavender might as well have been a dog pricking her ears up with how straight she suddenly sat up, her eyes wide and alert while she bit her lower lip as she told him, "I'm awake!"

While Harry chuckled again, Ron nudged Harry playfully as he asked, "Wow, you've _really_ got her trained well, haven't you, Harry?"

"Well enough to know she _is_ mine, Ronald," argued Harry, looking back to the redhead as he added, "Of course, if anyone else tried to dominate my Lavender, I'd make them swallow their tongues."

As Ron paled in alarm, Harry coughed once before he added, "No, I tell a lie: _I'm_ usually the one swallowing their tongues, right before I wash their mouths out with acid and salt, but you get the point, right?"

Ron just nodded dumbly, even as Harry smiled thinly before he cleared his throat as he asked, "Also, is it my imagination or is everyone else staring at us right now, mate?"

Even Lavender looked around while Ron gulped when he saw that Harry was right; everyone else in the Great Hall had their eyes fixed on the Gryffindor Table, including a furious-looking McGonagall, a disappointed-looking Dumbledore and a few other alarmed, disbelieving and even outraged – though that was mostly Snape – members of the Hogwarts school faculty.

Stretching up tall, as though he was simply working out the kinks in his system, Harry sighed audibly as he asked, "What's the matter with you lot now? Honestly, if I knew I was going to be watched by hundreds of people schoolwide, I'd have charged for Pay-Per-View!"

Lavender was the only one who laughed, even as McGonagall addressed Harry, "Mr Potter: not only have you continuously disrupted the feast _and_ the Sorting with your disrespectfully-horrifying attitude, you now interrupt and talk over the Headmaster when he is making some very important announcements regarding the next year."

"Important, says you?" asked Harry, cocking an eyebrow as he sneered before he added, "Then not worth the oxygen he wastes to make them, says I: so, how about we skip the Hi-De-Hi Campers speech and just get off to bed? It's late, I'm knackered and, quite frankly, if I don't get my eight hours, I _usually_ end up amusing myself…and I don't recall any Solitary Confinement Areas here, so how _will_ you make me toe the line?"

Even the Muggle-born and Half-Blood students who got the reference to Harry's usual punishments looked whiter than white could go, even as McGonagall looked to the Gryffindor Prefect, Percy Weasley, as she told him, "Mr Weasley, take your first-years up to Gryffindor Tower…and the same with the rest of you: go _now!_"

"Left-right-left-right-left-right, hup-two-three-four!"

"What are you doing _now,_ Potter?"

"Marching on command, General McGone-Away-And-Never-Coming-Back: say, do you mind if I start a round? _I don't know, but it's been said; I like torturing freaks in bed! I don't know, but I've been told: when I'm done with you, you're left stone-cold!_"

The Great Hall couldn't have emptied any faster if Voldemort himself had suddenly walked into the room, earning a curious, but also-intrigued look from Harry when he saw how, after the last student left, the only ones left there were him, Lavender and, to Harry's surprise, Ron, who could only stare in bewildered alarm and even disbelief at how calm Harry still looked, even as he looked up to the High Table.

"So…was it something I said?"

"Potter!" snapped Professor Snape, earning a curious look from Harry as the Potions Master told him, "Follow me to my office _now!_ Since you seem to enjoy fuelling your ego, you can start your detentions with me _tonight!_"

With that, the dungeon bat left his seat and left the hall, his robes billowing behind him in their usual manner.

Even as Harry made to follow, however, he smirked as he mused, "Note to self: ask him how he does that…oh, and you'd best run along, Ron, and take my girl with you. The last thing you need is to be locked out of Gryffindor Tower all night long…mind you, we _could_ have a campout, so…"

"Potter! Come _now!_"

"_Woof._"

The only one who laughed was Lavender, even as Harry followed Snape out of the hall.

However, as he left, none of the staff, especially not Snape, saw Harry's green eyes crackling with lightning as he _willingly_ followed his _professor_ out of the Great Hall and down to the dungeons.

_**Blackout**_

Even as she left with her new companion, who _clearly_ must have some degree of necessity for her beloved's plan if he befriended and put up with such a tactless moron with the eating habits of monkeys on marijuana of his own free will, Lavender heard Ron clear his throat before he asked, "Is it just me or should we actually feel _sorry_ for that greaseball, Snape?"

"You can if you want to," said Lavender, making her way up the Grand Staircase, where she could see a few Gryffindors waiting at the very top of the large stairwell, before she added, "Me? I'm going to count the seconds it takes for Harry to come back…but while I do, I've got a question for you, Ronald."

"Me?"

"Mm-hm," agreed Lavender, turning to Ron as she asked him, "Why did you want to be Harry's friend?"

"Because he's Harry Potter."

"And is that the only reason?" asked Lavender, indicating the school around them as she asked, "What I mean is: if you wanted to be friends with him because of who he is, aren't you scared by the _real_ him? Aren't you even the slightest bit intimidated by the thought that, at any moment, he might turn around and decide to use your blood to paint a self-portrait?"

"He…he'd do that?"

"Why not? He's done it before," said Lavender, earning an alarmed look from Ron, even as the brunette tittered, a part of her wondering exactly what Harry's plan was to have such a naïve little prat as his proverbial wingman, before she asked, "So? Why come after _my_ Harry if you want to be friends with _the_ Harry Potter?"

"I…well…because he's…and I…well, you see…"

"That's what I thought," said Lavender, chuckling softly, even as they reached the last stairway heading up to the entrance to Gryffindor Tower, outside which, Lavender scowled when she saw three more redheads with similar features to Ron's waiting for their arrival.

"About time!" snapped Percy Weasley, earning a bored look from Lavender, even as the self-centred idiot insisted, "Unfortunately, I cannot take any more points thanks to that ignorant brat, so…"

"I'm sorry," said Lavender, straightening up suddenly, like a coiled viper, as she glared at Percy, "But did you just insult Harry? Who the fuck do you think you are to speak that way about your betters, you insect?"

"_I_ am a school Prefect and, if you think I am intimidated by you _or_ him, then…"

"I'm only going to say this because my Harry seems to admire you two: so, here's a free word of advice," said Lavender, looking to the other two redheads with the prat, whom looked like twins, even as she added, "You should be running: you don't want to see this."

"See what?" scoffed Percy, turning to his brothers as he added, "Don't _move:_ I'm going to need witnesses to…"

The only thing the Twins could do was run when they saw their elder prick of a brother fall to the floor, though not before Lavender spoke again.

"Like I said…you should be running…"

_**Blackout**_

"Inside, Potter!"

"Woof," repeated Harry, having reached the dungeons where he was led to Professor Snape's office; as soon as he was inside, Harry moved to an open space on the floor before, to Snape's outrage, Harry sat down on his haunches, like a dog sat down, before he cocked his head to one side and let his tongue loll out of his mouth.

"What do you think you're doing, you insolent brat?"

"_Aroo?_" asked Harry, cocking his head to the other side as he added, "Bow-wow, woof-woof, pant-pant, oh, look, a cat: and the postman! Woof-woof-woof; cock my leg on the lamppost…grrr-grrr…"

"Potter! Tell me what you're doing or else…"

"Yes?" asked Harry suddenly, springing up to his feet as he smiled with a mixture of excitement and anticipation that made his green eyes shine even brighter than before as he asked, "What will you do, Professor Snape? Because I can tell: you and me, we're nothing like those pathetically-impotent sheep who shoot their mouths off, but don't do anything else."

"What…what do you…"

"Oh, come on, you can have some fun with me if you want to, Professor," laughed Harry, stepping back before he spread his arms wide as he added, "Tell you what: I'll even give you a free first shot. Go on, whatever spell you can think of: do it to me! Use your wand, not your words, and show me what happens to someone who disturbs a dark soul like ours!"

"I am _nothing_ like you!"

"Oh, but you _are,_" drawled Harry, keeping his arms spread to the side as he laughed, "You're as damaged, twisted and broken up, inside _and_ out, as _I_ am. I sensed it in you when I saw you sitting there at the table, next to my interesting compatriot, Professor Quirrell: you have darkness inside of you, Snape…and I'm asking…no…"

Suddenly, Snape's eyes widened when Harry dropped to his knees with a beyond-maniacal gleam in his eyes as he laughed, "I'm _begging_ you, you vulture-faced, grease pit who is apparently human: use that darkness! Unleash the beast: tickle the sleeping dragon; stir the hornets' nest; tickle the sleeping dragon…oh wait, I already said that…ah well: come _on,_ Snape; I _know_ you want to!"

"You…you're…you're _insane!_"

"Actually, I'm a Leo, but thanks anyway," drawled Harry, though not before he sighed sadly as he rose from his knees before he clicked his tongue as he added, "Ah well, I see even the head of the snake is defanged and de-venomed…shame…still, you can't say I didn't give you a free shot, you pathetic excuse for a dark spirit: I'd bet even a Muggle-born like my Mother wouldn't touch you with a…"

"_Sectumsempra!_"

Suddenly, Harry leapt up onto the desk, startling Severus as he saw the curse used by the Potions Master slice through the desk behind Harry, leaving a deep gouge, but no damage to Harry, who just stared in amazement.

"Oh…so my Mum's a sore topic for you, is she, Snape? Thanks for the info…and that was your one free shot, so…my turn!"

"What are _you_ going to…"

Before Severus could finish his remark, his eyes widened with horror when Harry conjured not one, but two electrically-charged whips, both of which he cracked and snapped at the air, sending sparks flying as he faced the Potions Master before, lashing the whip once, he made Severus jump back in alarm as he laughed, "Come on, Snape: _dance_ for me, why don't you?"

"I…I'll see you _expelled_ for…for this, you…you ignorant…insolent…arrogant…you're just like your Father!"

"Well, I suppose you'd know better than me," argued Harry, lashing the whip once more.

However, as Severus dodged it, he gasped in horror when a loud, shrill alarm echoed through his office, earning a curious look from Harry as he looked around.

"What _is_ that terrible din? It's covering up your impotent ideas of who I am!"

"A…a student is…is in danger!"

"I see," said Harry, retracting his whips as he added, "Well, unless you want that danger to become mortally-fatal, I suggest you step aside and leave this to the professionals."

"What are you talking about?" asked Severus, watching as Harry flipped himself off the desk before he moved to the door of the office.

"Well, I'm down here toying with you, so there's only one student in this school who'd be the cause of such racket and, unfortunately for you bunch of monkey-shit-for-brains, the only one she'd listen to is down here with you, so, again, step aside and let me take care of this or be part of what is _probably_ going to be the death of a student before too long!"

As Snape moved aside, acknowledging the threat for what it was – a _promise_ – Harry made his way through the door, though not before he turned back to the Potions Master as he added, "Oh, and one more thing…"

Before Severus could ask, Harry sent a volley of lightning bolts towards the Potions Master, sending him flying through the air as he crashed into what was left of his desk, leaving Harry free to leave.

Though not before the eyes of the dark lion lit up like a Christmas Tree as he hissed, "Don't _ever_ think I'm just one of your students, Snape: the next time might end up costing you more than you can afford."

The slam of the office door might as well have been the slam of Snape's coffin lid.

_**Blackout**_

"Now, tell me, are you going to apologise for insulting your betters, insect?"

"HOW DARE YOU! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME! I'M A SCHOOL PREFECT! I WILL HAVE YOU EXPELLED! ARRESTED! STRIPPED OF YOUR MAGIC! YOU WILL NEVER BE A WITCH AGAIN AFTER THIS, DO YOU HEAR ME?"

"I bet all of Hogwarts and Hogsmeade can hear you, worm," argued a familiar voice, earning an excited look from Lavender as she looked behind her to see Harry standing against the rail on the Grand Staircase, his arms folded while he had an eyebrow cocked in curiosity as he craned his neck over the side as he asked, "So…you couldn't even last one night before letting out the murderess within, Lavender?"

"He _deserves_ this!" snarled Lavender, looking down to where she had Percy Weasley at her mercy.

And one hand wrapped tightly around his hand while the rest of him dangled over the banister of the Grand Staircase, with nothing but seven floors of open space and several hundred feet of height between him and the ground.

"I'm sure he _does,_" agreed Harry, looking to his right, just in time to see the portrait hole leading into Gryffindor Tower open, revealing the other members of their House, all of whom looked beyond-horrified at what they saw, while as Harry looked to the left, he saw McGonagall, Dumbledore and even Filch had managed to reach the seventh floor.

"And here comes the cavalry," said Harry, moving forwards before he asked, "So, how does he deserve it, my girl?"

"He insulted you."

"And that was cause enough to dangle him off the edge of the staircase like you did to Maxine McCreedy when she tried to dunk my head in the ice-cold bath just because she hated how my hair would never lie flat?"

"This is different."

"Yeah, I know," agreed Harry, reaching over the rail before he gripped Percy's hand in his as he added, "This one's a _much_ bigger drop."

"POTTER!" Exclaimed Percy, disbelief evident in his eyes as he screamed, "THANK MERLIN! I _KNEW_ YOU WERE REALLY A HERO! PULL ME UP! PLEASE! I PROMISE, I'LL NEVER BOTHER YOU AGAIN! PLEASE! PULL ME UP, SO I CAN PUNISH THIS BITCH AND SEE HER SENT TO AZKABAN WHERE SHE BELONGS!"

"Bored now."

Suddenly, gasps of horror filled the Grand Staircase as both Harry and Lavender released Percy, leaving him to fall down the empty space between the seventh floor and the ground floor. As if that wasn't bad enough, a lone stairway chose that time to move around, which meant Percy would be broken into a million pieces, if not permanently-disfigured and paralysed on impact.

Or rather, it would, were it not for the intervention of the shepherd to the sheep.

"_Arresto Momentum!_"

"And that took longer than it probably should have done…_why?_" drawled Harry, watching as Dumbledore's spell slowed Percy to a safe, steady halt on the staircase; when he landed, however, Percy was practically crawling, whimpering, sputtering out nonsense and, to the disgust of those who appeared to see what the noise was about, he'd even soiled himself.

Harry, however, looked up from the fall as he sniffed once before he told Lavender, "Let her go, my girl…don't worry; we'll kill them next time."

"Potter! What did you think you…"

"I know, I know, it was naughty, _bad Harry…_so, what's next? More detentions with the snarky git…oh, that reminds me: someone should go and check his office. I think he _might_ need a medic soon, but thanks for leaving me alone in an empty room with him, Headmaster."

"Harry," gasped Dumbledore, horror evident in his eyes as he asked, "Why…why did you do this?"

"Well, first things first, he _probably_ shouldn't have said I was a hero," said Harry, shrugging ruefully as he scratched at the scar on his eye before he added, "I mean, I might be wearing robes, but I don't see tights and a big letter S, so I'm _not_ a hero and I never will be."

"Is that all?"

"Of course not, McGormless," said Harry, putting an arm around Lavender, who cuddled into his side with a mixture of relief and dark liking, even as Harry smiled wolfishly at the Head of Gryffindor, who paled in horror as he went on.

"His second, and fatal…or _would_ have been fatal if not for the old codger here, but I digress: his second mistake was insulting my girl; oh, but if your plan now involves sending us to Azkaban, Professor, then, by all means, go right ahead: compared to this place, it sounds like a holiday."

**Chapter 6 and, holy shitake mushrooms mushed together and fried up on the Devil's cooker: if there was any doubt that Harry Potter was here to be a hero, I'd say it's well-and-truly gone now, but what **_**will**_** McGonagall do about such a violent move on one of her own?**

**Also, if Harry doesn't fear Dumbledore, isn't intimidated by Snape, finds Quirrell interesting and is willing to see if wizards really **_**can**_** fly just for going after his girl, how do you think he might react to the one fate no Gryffindor, especially no Weasley, wants to put up with?**

**Keep Reading to Find Out**

**Next Chapter: Dumbledore tries to keep the peace, but Harry gets an early introduction to the Gryffindor Table's worst nightmare…and yet, if the sender thinks that's a message, here's one back with interest;**

**Please Read and Review**


	7. Rule Two: Remember It!

Blackout

**Disclaimer/Plot/Author's Note: **SEE FIRST CHAPTER

**Dedication: **I'd like to dedicate this story to my friends, fans and fellow Darksiders: my recommended reads are _Harry Potter and the Revival of Soul Magic, Harry Potter: Birth of Technomancy_ and _The Court of Shadows_ by AlphaPheonix, _When the Thunder Breaks_ by WeLonelyOldSouls, _The Downward Spiral Saga_ by BolshevikMuppet99, _Damaged Raven_ and _Dark Lord Potter_ by JustBored21, _Harry Is A Dragon, And That's Okay_ by Saphroneth, _Harry Potter and The Ashes of Chaos_ by ACI100, _The Dark Lord Peverell-Slytherin_ by Ares Peverell-Slytherin, _Yield to the Darkness_ and _Just A Touch of Kleptomania_ by Quatermass, _Dark Lord Potter_ by loverofeevee and _Path to Power_ by sirius009

**Key Pairing: **Harry/Harem

**Other Pairings: **To be determined

Normal Speech

'Thoughts'

'_Mental Speech_'

/_Parseltongue_/

**Review Answers:**

**The Deck Master: Yes…and **_**then**_** the fun will begin**

**HMRoberts: I don't get it**

**WhiteElfElder: No impairment? Did you forget what he did to Granger? And I doubt Severus is just going to get up and walk away from that lightning blast…oh, and Percy's wounds might not be physical, but they're still caused by Harry, right?**

**Chaos Snow Kitsune: The final piece of the puzzle is coming up, my friend, and then, in the words of Jim Carrey: **_**the real game begins**_

**JustBored21: Yes, my friend: hope you like what's coming**

"_Harry," gasped Dumbledore, horror evident in his eyes as he asked, "Why…why did you do this?"_

"_Well, first things first, he probably shouldn't have said I was a hero," said Harry, shrugging ruefully as he scratched at the scar on his eye before he added, "I mean, I might be wearing robes, but I don't see tights and a big letter S, so I'm not a hero and I never will be."_

"_Is that all?"_

"_Of course not, McGormless," said Harry, putting an arm around Lavender, who cuddled into his side with a mixture of relief and dark liking, even as Harry smiled wolfishly at the Head of Gryffindor, who paled in horror as he went on._

"_His second, and fatal…or would have been fatal if not for the old codger here, but I digress: his second mistake was insulting my girl; oh, but if your plan now involves sending us to Azkaban, Professor, then, by all means, go right ahead: compared to this place, it sounds like a holiday."_

Chapter 7: Rule Two: Remember It!

It was only the first night of the new term at Hogwarts and, already, Albus Dumbledore was in a quandary concerning the fate of one student.

Harry James Potter: a boy whom he now saw to be the ruthless, merciless, broken-spirited youth that he had met in that strange Muggle residence; at the same time, Albus could see _nothing_ that was Lily or James, not even James' humour or his way of targeting others with pranks. He also saw little to nothing of Lily's light-hearted soul and neutrality towards all things.

In fact, the only one Harry showed any sort of _light_ around was the equally-broken girl with him, Lavender Brown, whom Albus now saw as someone who was only tame _because_ Harry was there. Similarly, Harry had shown he was willing to hurt, dismember and, Merlin forbid, even _kill_ anyone who so much as looked at this girl wrong. And, in the case of Percy Weasley and as said boy proved, Harry didn't even care if you were someone in authority or with the means of making things worse for him.

Target Miss Brown, in any way whatsoever, and you were screwed, as the Muggles said.

Even worse, judging by how she stayed close to Harry, it was obvious, even to Albus that this same girl seemed to be the _only_ thing that kept the sleeping dragon in its den. Without her, all Hell broke loose and the _real_ monster came out without much care for who, what, where, when or why he was doing whatever he was doing when the beast was unleashed.

So, with such a horrifying revelation in his mind, Albus had to wonder what he was meant to do: if he expelled the Brown girl, he risked the health and safety of everyone else in Hogwarts.

If he expelled Harry, he risked leaving the world vulnerable to the boy's darkness, not to mention how little he might care if and when Tom returned.

And that just couldn't happen.

Harry _had_ to care about Tom still being alive.

How else was he supposed to die at the right time as the prophecy stated?

But, if he was meant to have such a future, how could Albus ensure this _and_ keep the peace within his own school?

_**Blackout**_

Not to Harry's surprise, when he opened his eyes on his first _real_ morning at Hogwarts, he was the only boy in the Gryffindor Dormitory, while Neville Longbottom, Dean Thomas, Seamus Finnegan and even Ronald Weasley had already gotten out of bed and left him to sleep.

And yet, Harry wasn't the only _person_ in Gryffindor Tower, as the warmth that nuzzled his chest told him as he smiled softly before, looking down, he fingered the mess of light-brown hair he saw lying there. "Sleep well, Lavender?"

"Now I'm back where I love being, I _did,_" agreed the girl, lifting her head from Harry's chest before she cocked her head to one side as she asked him, "Do you think we can get through our first day in peace, Harry?"

"No," said Harry in a matter-of-fact voice, lifting himself up before he sighed softly as he explained, "Even though McGroaner let us stay here for tonight, I imagine she's been making plans with the old coot and his little cheerleaders to get us away from the rest of these idiots. Meanwhile, I'd bet my wand and my wealth that Snape's not going to let my little shock therapy session go quite so easily…and then we have to consider the way that Percy Weasley is still breathing our air. Something tells me he's going to make sure we pay for that."

"So…can I kill someone?"

"Sorry, my sweet, but no," said Harry, stretching up before he scratched at his lightning-bolt scar as he explained, "Or rather…not _yet._ After all, I don't need to remind you of Rule Two, do I?"

"Death should be a release, not a punishment," said Lavender, earning a nod from Harry before, as the young girl watched, she saw Harry stretch up high before he doubled over, stretching out the tensions in his back and his arms. Once that was done, the young Gryffindor cleared his throat before he scratched at his head as he looked around in bemusement.

"Now…what am I forgetting? Oh yeah: Hela!"

To Lavender's surprise, what could only be described as a burst of ice-cold darkness responded to Harry's summoning.

When it faded away, the girl stared in disbelief, awe and shocked wonder as she saw a black-feathered bird, whom could only be described as the most-beautiful creature she'd ever seen – second-only to Harry, naturally – appear and land on her beloved's right shoulder. As well as its sleek, liquid-like black feathers, which shone like black metal mixed with the world's most-beautiful feathers, the bird had eyes that were as green as Harry's, filled with the same dark gleam and even holding the same cold, unforgiving glare as his.

As the bird nipped at Harry's ear, Lavender gulped before she asked, "Harry…where…who…what…"

"Her name is Hela and she's my familiar," said Harry, stroking the feathered breast of his beautiful creature as he explained, "She _chose_ me when I came into my own and is the only reason I'm really here at this boring place in the first place."

"Blimey!" gasped Lavender, walking towards Harry before she reached up and petted the bird, earning a low, almost-ghostly-sounding trill-like sound from the bird, even as Lavender gasped out, "She's _beautiful…_and so unique; is…is she a phoenix?"

"No, she's…actually, I don't know _what_ she is," admitted Harry, smiling as he saw his bird companion, Hela, spread her wings in enjoyment of the attention she was receiving from Lavender, while Harry went on, "All I know is that she came from within the wand that Albus _I'm-a-big-old-bastard-with-an-ego-bigger-than-all-of-Hell-and-half-of-Texas_ Dumbledore _used_ to own: when she emerged, she bonded with me and…I don't know what it was, exactly, but something about her just clicked with me and, when it did, she advised me that coming here and putting up with these weirdoes was for the best, if only for my own sake."

"So, in other words, she's who I have to thank for being reunited with you, my raven, and getting to have all this fun?"

"Precisely," said Harry, looking from Hela to Lavender as he added, "But you can thank her later; for now, hurry up and get dressed. I'm hungry."

As was always the case with her obeying his wishes, Lavender didn't need telling twice.

_**Blackout**_

For the second mealtime in a row, the majority of Gryffindor House seemed content to give Harry and Lavender as much room as possible, by sitting as far away from the two savagely-minded lions as they could possibly be without abandoning their table.

To Harry's mild surprise, the only ones who seemed even half-willing to sit near him and Lavender, if not maybe a seat or two away from them at most, were Ron Weasley, Neville Longbottom and, to Harry's surprise, Fred and George Weasley, both of whom seemed to shadow their youngest brother as though they feared Harry might do something to him.

As for Neville, he seemed courteous enough to give the two a curt nod as they took their seats; however, before Harry could help himself to some breakfast, his mood darkened when a familiar annoying voice yelled, "WHAT IS _THAT?_"

"Funny, I was just about to say the same thing," drawled Harry, plucking a sausage from the offerings before he gave it to Hela, who began swallowing it whole, as though she was downing a particularly fat and juicy worm.

"I hate to agree with Granger," added Ron, earning a curious look from Harry as the redhead indicated the bird on Harry's shoulder, "But what…I mean _who_ is that, Harry? I…I don't think I've ever seen a bird like her before."

"That's because she's one of a kind, just like her master," replied Lavender, offering a bit of meat to Hela herself before she added, "But, if you must know, Weasley, she's Harry's familiar."

"Familiar?" asked Neville, speaking to Harry for the first time since he'd met the boy, even as he looked up at Harry, as well as Lavender and Hela as he asked, "You…you have a familiar, do you, Harry?"

"Isn't that what Lavender just said, Longbottom?" asked Harry coolly, stroking Hela's feathers while he scowled at the shy boy as he added, "Also, it's Mr Potter to you: just because I'm forced to share a dorm with you, it doesn't mean we're friends."

"But…but our parents…"

"Aren't here," said Harry in a matter-of-fact tone, looking to Lavender with a disgruntled expression as he asked, "Okay, seriously: what is it about either seeing one of my rather-fetching scars or thinking that just because their families knew mine, it automatically gives these freaks the right to say we're besties, Lavender?"

"What can I say? Wizards are idiots…present company excluded, Harry," said Lavender, petting Harry's hand in a way that showed him how she meant _he_ was the present company excluded from her remark about the rest of the idiots in the world.

"Excuse me," snarled Granger, earning a bored look from Harry as she asked him, "But I believe you were explaining how you had a dangerous creature who is against the rules about owls, cats and toads…"

"Before you finish that boring lecture, Granger, tell me: how's your brand? It looks like it could use a _top up!_" hissed Harry, sparking up his fingers as though emphasising his point, earning a horrified look from the burned brunette while Harry continued in a cold, emotionless voice, "And before you go wasting any more of my oxygen claiming how you think the _noble_ Professor Dumbledore and McGilligan will protect you, just remember what I did to the last ignorant prick who got on my nerves…and they were standing right there _watching_ me do it, in case you forgot!"

"How are you still _here?_" asked Granger, earning a cold smile from Harry, even as she added, "If you were at a Muggle school…"

"This _isn't_ Muggle School, much less a part of the Muggle world, stupid girl," sneered Harry, smiling cruelly as he drew himself to his full height as he explained, "You see, if it _were_ Muggle School, I'd be sent to my warm and uncomfortably-fun room in my nice padded room, where I'd pass the time tossing a tennis ball at the wall because there isn't someone's head or balls for me to throw it at. Who knows? I might even finally get around to mastering the harmonica."

"What do you think this is? The Great Escape?" asked Granger, earning a slow shake of the head from Harry.

"No, because unlike that classic, I don't _want_ to escape: why would I, Granger? I'm having way too much making everyone else's life as hellish as possible…which reminds me; since you _do_ want a new tattoo…"

To his amusement, as well as most of the Great Hall, the brunette fled from the hall like a bat out of hell, leaving Harry to return to his meal while he added, "Now, if it's not too much trouble, can I _please_ get back to the important stuff? You know, like taming the monster in my belly?"

"HARRY POTTER!"

Even Harry violently flinched at the _way_-too-loud voice that suddenly filled the Great Hall, just as he saw Ron, Fred and George duck under the table while, when Harry turned to the source of the scream, he saw a disgusting-looking redheaded lady with a blood-red face and eyes that screamed bloody murder, but then again, so did her voice. She was dressed in a frilly apron with clothes that screamed housewife and maternal sort while, to Harry's curiosity, the woman was even brandishing what looked like a ladle, which she pointed at Harry.

"EXPLAIN YOURSELF _NOW, _YOUNG MAN!"

"Oh, look at that, Lavender; this place has kitchen staff, after all," drawled Harry, turning to the High Table where, to his annoyance, he saw Dumbledore looking like Christmas had come early, even as McGonagall and, more or less, everyone else on the High Table looked horrified at the sight of the maternal woman standing there.

It didn't take long for the penny to drop, at least for Harry, as to who this loud shrieking mad woman was and why she was there, but, instead of looking annoyed, Harry just chuckled softly before, to the shock of the three Weasleys, he _applauded_ loudly, rising from his seat as he did so.

"Bra-_vo,_ Headmaster…or was this _your_ doing, McGuillotine? Either way, well done, nice touch…I admit, I've never had _this_ happen because I've taught someone what happens when you fuck with the wrong people."

"You watch your language when speaking to the Headmaster, you ignorant rude child!"

"Excuse me, but why is the housemaid talking?" asked Harry, moving away from the Gryffindor Table before he looked to said housemaid-like woman as he asked, "So…_you're_ the woman who turned Mr Ego into the prick he is, are you? And, let me guess, after giving him a lesson he _won't_ soon forget about what respect looks like to those who don't give a flying fuck about…"

"_Scourgify!_"

To Harry's disbelief, bubbles suddenly flew towards him, though not before he sparked up, using his lightning to pop the bubbles, much to the redhead's alarm, while Harry sneered as he scoffed incredulously, "I'm sorry, but did you _actually_ just try and attack me with _bubbles?_"

"You won't stop cursing, I'll wash your mouth out with soap, you rude boy!"

"So you attack me with _bubbles?_" asked Harry, the air of disbelief in his voice growing as he turned back to Dumbledore before he asked, "So, do you allow every parent to waltz in here like they own the place and start attacking students with _bubbles,_ Dumbledore?"

"That's _Professor_ Dumbledore, you ungrateful little brat!"

"Okay, can we _stop_ with the comments from the peanut gallery?" asked Harry, looking back to the woman he'd identified as Percy, Ron, Fred and George's Mother, Mrs Weasley, while he added, "Since you're not listening to anyone, but the echo of your own voice, you banshee bitch, let me make it simple for you: _go on, now go, walk out the door, just turn around now, cause you're not welcome anymore…_"

"_Weren't you the one who'd try to hurt with me with goodbye?_" asked, or rather, _sang_ Lavender, earning a laugh from Harry as he saw how at least one person got the joke, while Lavender kept singing, "_Did you think I'd crumble? Did you think I'd lay down and die? Oh no, not I: I will survive…_"

"SHUT UP, YOU CRAZY BITCH!"

And, with that, dead silence filled the Great Hall, earning more-worried, if not frightened looks from the Weasley Trio while Harry craned his neck, his green eyes shining with dark intentions as he hissed, "I will survive…but tell me, Mrs Weasley…will _you?_"

"Harry, NO!"

Before Dumbledore had a chance to intervene, Harry went _full lightning,_ using his power in a way that reminded many who knew of the skill of a certain Dark Lord from a well-known sci-fi franchise. Bolts of black lightning flew from Harry's hands, striking Mrs Weasley hard and fast, earning terrified screams from the redhead as she flew back while her body lit up like Times Square from the electricity coursing through her.

"SOMEONE STOP HIM!" Roared one of the Hufflepuffs, earning more cries of outrage and disbelief from the students.

When the red flashes flew from the staff table, however, the aforementioned staff were left speechless when, instead of being stunned and knocked out, Harry's body seemed to _absorb_ the flashes, turning his black lightning red while Harry increased his power, earning louder, more-terrified screams from Mrs Weasley as she writhed in torment.

"POTTER, ENOUGH! _STOP THIS!_"

"No!" growled Harry, moving one hand to point at the staff table while the other kept up his onslaught as he growled, "_You_ let this vile whore come here and think she could make me bare my throat, Dumbledore: _you_ and your thick-as-pig-shit Deputy let this slut think she could act as though she's a dead woman: well now, congratulations, because she _will_ be a dead woman."

"Harry…"

Suddenly, even Dumbledore looked shocked when he saw Professor Quirrell step forwards, earning a curious look from Harry while the Defence Professor held up his hands as he told the boy, "L-l-let it g-g-g-go…she…she's n-n-n-not w-w-w-worth it. W-W-W-What i-i-i-is it you b-b-believe?"

"He…he's right, my raven," agreed Lavender, while Hela flew to Harry's shoulder and let out the same ghostly trill as before, earning more shocked, awed, but still-alarmed looks from staff and students alike, even as Lavender asked, "Rule Two, remember?"

To the disbelief of the rest of the hall, Harry's lightning assault lessened, leaving Molly's body burned and more than a little bloody, thanks to the blood oozing from her ears, as well as her nose and mouth from screaming so loud, while Harry smiled thinly.

"Death should be a release, not a punishment."

"Ex-ex-exactly," stammered Quirrell, though, when Harry looked to the Defence Professor, he saw Quirrell nod slowly, as though encouraging Harry to play along, while he also told his young student, "A-A-And besides, if…if y-y-y-you k-k-k-kill her…you…you'll o-o-only find yourself sent t-t-to A-A-A-Azkaban and y-y-y-you will n-n-n-never get a c-c-c-chance to be the b-b-b-best sorcerer y-y-y-y-you can be."

"I suppose that's true," agreed Harry, rubbing the bridge of his nose before he looked past Quirrell to Dumbledore as he added, "But take note, old man: this is the _last_ time I show any sort of mercy to your pathetic sheep flock. _Anyone_ comes after me and mine after this, all bets are off…which reminds me, I notice Snape's not at the table this morning. I _do_ hope he hasn't been hurt _too_ badly!"

Even the Slytherins were left speechless by the fact that they now realised why their Head of House wasn't there.

Dumbledore, meanwhile, turned to McGonagall as he told her, "Minerva, would you and Hagrid kindly take Mrs Weasley to the Hospital Wing? I think she is going to need medical treatment."

"And then I'm going to need a lawyer," drawled Harry, looking to Quirrell with a hard, firm stare that seemed to drill through Quirrell's skull.

"I don't suppose you'd do us a _favour_ and recommend someone to help defend me, should I actually _need_ them, do you, Professor?"

**Chapter 7 and it's safe to say that even the Banshee has, hopefully, learned not to tickle the sleeping dragon and think she can screech at Harry and he'll wag his tail, but what's going to happen now?**

**Also, it looks like Harry's calling in his marker with Quirrell, but will this change anything between them later…and what about the unseen advocate whom encourages Quirrell to aid Harry, no matter what?**

**Keep Reading to Find Out**

**Next Chapter: Even Harry Potter can't escape facing possible justice for what he's done: unfortunately, it would seem his counsel is the last person any Light-sider would want watching the Boy-Who-Lived's back…but is that the whole point or just part of the plan?**

**Please Read and Review**


	8. I Fought the Law (And the Law Won!)

Blackout

**Disclaimer/Plot/Author's Note: **SEE FIRST CHAPTER

**Dedication: **I'd like to dedicate this story to my friends, fans and fellow Darksiders: my recommended reads are _Harry Potter and the Revival of Soul Magic, Harry Potter: Birth of Technomancy_ and _The Court of Shadows_ by AlphaPheonix, _When the Thunder Breaks_ by WeLonelyOldSouls, _The Downward Spiral Saga_ by BolshevikMuppet99, _Damaged Raven_ and _Dark Lord Potter_ by JustBored21, _Harry Is A Dragon, And That's Okay_ by Saphroneth, _Harry Potter and The Ashes of Chaos_ by ACI100, _The Dark Lord Peverell-Slytherin_ by Ares Peverell-Slytherin, _Yield to the Darkness_ and _Just A Touch of Kleptomania_ by Quatermass, _Dark Lord Potter_ by loverofeevee and _Path to Power_ by sirius009

**Key Pairing: **Harry/Harem

**Other Pairings: **To be determined

Normal Speech

'Thoughts'

'_Mental Speech_'

/_Parseltongue_/

**Review Answers:**

**The Deck Master: Would you believe me if I said I didn't?**

**WhiteElfElder: And what about Percy's mental traumas? I'd say he's probably going to learn his lesson and, if not, have a nice little reminder waiting in his nightmares for nigh-on forever, don't you?**

**Chaos Snow Kitsune: You're not alone there, my friend**

**Yugi the Godfather of Games: Ha! Even **_**I**_** didn't realise that until I read your review and looked back…thanks for the laughs**

**JustBored21: Admittedly, I'm starting to get into the plot more and more with this story and, as always, I have your amazing work to refer to if I need some inspiration, so, again, a thanks for that…oh, and trust me, this coming chapter actually took some thought, but I hope it's just as good as you've enjoyed others so far**

"_Minerva, would you and Hagrid kindly take Mrs Weasley to the Hospital Wing? I think she is going to need medical treatment."_

"_And then I'm going to need a lawyer," drawled Harry, looking to Quirrell with a hard, firm stare that seemed to drill through Quirrell's skull._

"_I don't suppose you'd do us a favour and recommend someone to help defend me, should I actually need them, do you, Professor?"_

Chapter 8: I Fought the Law (And the Law Won!)

"Where's a tennis ball when we need it?"

As much as she agreed with her beloved's remark, Lavender still laughed as the two of them sat alone in the Headmaster's Office, while they waited for Albus Dumbledore and the rest of his sheep to make their calls and retrieve the aid of the so-called authorities.

Then again, after _nearly_ killing a nuisance whose voice still rang in his ears as he waited in the otherwise-quiet office, Harry shouldn't really be surprised, and he wasn't.

Of course, nobody, but Harry and Lavender knew that Harry was retrieving some aid of his own, thanks to Professor Quirrell, who understood the underlying message of Harry's request for a lawyer. And yet, Harry wondered exactly who the not-stammering Professor with the dark streak as long as Harry's own would bring to the table to defend Harry and ensure things went as _he_ wanted them to.

In the meantime, Harry drummed his fingers impatiently on Dumbledore's desk as he mused, "Here we are in lockdown and they don't even give us something to pass the time. I thought Agatha was a no-brained bint, but this lot make her seem like a genius."

"How _is_ old Aga anyway?" asked Lavender, watching as Harry rose up from his seat and began walking around the room, while Lavender asked him, "Did you give her daughter the release yet?"

"Nope."

"Did you give them a hint on how to bring her out of the coma?"

"And spoil my fun? Why would I _ever_ do something so boring, Lavender?"

"So, she's still suffering?"

"Yep," drawled Harry, stopping next to a cabinet that was filled with an array of mysterious instruments and knickknacks, while he added, "And so is Aggie, but I digress: have you _seen_ this collection, Lavender? The guy makes ravens seem sane with their shiny-things-obsessions!"

"Magpies, my love."

"Huh?" asked Harry, running a hand over the door of the cabinet as he searched for the means to open the cabinet.

"You mean magpies," said Lavender, smiling thinly as she saw Harry search for the means to invade the old bastard's privacy as the aforementioned old King of Freaks seemed intent on letting his sheep do to her Harry. "They're the ones that like shiny things."

"Oh," said Harry, before he smiled when he heard a click, "So, what do ravens like?"

"Carrion."

"I think I _shall,_" laughed Harry, opening the cabinet before he picked up the first object, which seemed to be made of crystal, "Aww, how sweet…how well-formed…and how…_whoops._"

To Lavender's amusement, Harry's lightning suddenly caused the crystal object in his hands to explode, earning a soft giggle from Lavender as she asked, "How delicate?"

"I was going to say expensive-looking, but yeah," said Harry, letting the shards fall to the floor before he scoffed, "Seriously, not even an enchantment to keep wandering hands out: this guy would be the kleptos' idea of nirvana, you know?"

"You should put those pieces back soon, young man."

"Who said that?" asked Harry, turning to face the room, but the only thing he saw was Lavender, as well as the desk, a red-feathered bird on the far side of said desk and the Sorting Hat, the sight of which made Harry scoff as he asked, "I'm sorry, you old dust-cloth: did you _actually_ just try and tell me what to do? Didn't you remember why you gave me my wish and sent me to Gryffindor in the first place?"

"It…it wasn't _me,_ Mr Potter," said the hat, nervousness and fear evident in his voice as he added, "It…it was one of _them._"

His tip gestured upwards as he said the last part, causing Harry's eyes to wander upwards to the walls above the old man's desk, which allowed him to see a small rogues' gallery of differently-looking men and women in portraits looking down at him with judgmental, alarmed and, in a couple of cases, even amused and curious gazes.

"Hmm…let me guess…former Headmasters and Headmistresses," said Harry; it _wasn't_ a question, though the portraits' occupants still nodded and chorused the positive in their responses, earning a scoff from Harry as he added, "Well, as nice as it is to meet you, I don't think, unless you're alive and members of my family, not to mention accepted by _me_ as such, I suggest you paint a zipper over your mouths and then close it up. After all…"

To the horror of many of the portraits' occupants, Harry's hands lit up with his reddish-black lightning again as he told them, "Your parchments and wooden, painted to look metallic-gold frames are _so_ flammable or conductive to electricity these days…I'd _hate_ to accidentally misfire my bolts and leave nothing but ashes…"

As many of the occupants retreated into their portraits, Harry adopted a look of feigned realisation as he added, "Oh wait…no I wouldn't."

Before any of the portraits' occupants could say another word, Harry threw his lightning at the gallery, incinerating wood, golden-metal, as well as the parchments and canvasses that the portraits had been painted onto. To his dark, twisted sense of delight, the portraits' occupants also began screaming in pain, agony and pleading for him to stop, not that he listened.

Instead, once he'd taken out many of the portraits, Harry's eyes wandered over the rest of them as he told them, "Let that be a lesson to _you,_ sirs and madams: don't get in my way and, next time, keep your eyes open and your mouths shut."

"Harry, what have you _done?_"

"And now, ladies and gents, this is the moment you've been waiting for," drawled Harry, moving away from the cabinet of odds-and-ends as he took a seat in the golden throne of the Headmaster, much to Lavender's amusement, as she too rose up and moved to stand behind said throne, like a faithful ally shadowing her king, as the two of them saw Albus Dumbledore, Minerva McGonagall and Filius Flitwick walk into the room.

With them, Harry found himself looking at a tall, dull-looking redheaded male who seemed somewhere between alarmed and even disbelieving at what he was seeing, as well as a stern-faced lady with dark-brown hair and fierce, hazel-coloured eyes, one of which was covered by a monocle, not to mention two other figures, one of whom couldn't have been that much older than Harry himself.

She was a somewhat-attractive young lady with – and Harry had to blink and rub his eyes to check he wasn't seeing things – _bubblegum-pink_ hair and wide, awed, but also alarmed grey eyes that looked at Harry as though she was looking at someone whom was long since dead. With her was a heavily-scarred man whom had one eye replaced by a prosthetic eye, which whizzed about in its socket as the man stepped into the room with the aid of a large staff and a metallic leg, the sight of which made Harry snort to himself as he could only wonder how the frighteningly-interesting-looking man had lost both his leg and his eye.

Finally, Harry's lips twitched in amused curiosity when he saw a blonde-haired gentleman whom could have been described as an older version of a certain Slytherin he knew and hadn't _really_ gotten involved with, walk into the room before he walked around the desk and, stopping on Harry's other side, the gentleman cocked an eyebrow as he eyed Harry.

"Extraordinary."

"And quite comfortable too," drawled Harry, earning a soft titter from the pink-haired girl, the sound of which made Harry smile, even as he nodded once with a look of realisation, "Oh, you mean _I'm_ extraordinary? Well, I appreciate the compliment, Mr Malfoy."

"You know me, Mr Potter?"

"No, but thank you for confirming it," said Harry, straightening himself in the golden throne before he looked back to the small group of other companions as he asked, "So, I'm assuming the redhead is related to that loud-mouthed bitch who burned _way_ too easily, but what about the rest of you? For example, who is this _very_ interesting-looking gentleman who seems to have more scars than _me?_ I never would have thought that was even remotely-possible, would you, Lavender?"

"Not after everything you went through growing up, my love," agreed Lavender, just as they both heard Dumbledore clear his throat.

"Harry, would you mind leaving my seat? My old bones…"

"Can probably manage a good armchair, Albus, _old chap,_" drawled Harry, indicating the headmaster as he added, "And if you can't find one, then just conjure one: you _are_ still a wizard, aren't you?"

Even as Dumbledore resigned himself to doing as Harry suggested, the young wizard snorted in amused liking when a familiar ghostly wail suddenly filled the room; as everyone looked up to the rafters of the office, they saw Hela, Harry's familiar, fly down and perch herself on the arm of the throne, where Harry began petting her fondly, even as he cocked his head to one side.

"Really? Is that right? Wow…he sounds like a real badass…just a shame that this old fart leashes and collars him…"

"Who are you talking to, Harry?" asked the pink-haired girl, earning a small smile from Harry.

"My familiar, Miss…and thank you for at least showing you know me, even though I don't know you; of course, you can still go ahead and call me whatever you want."

When he winked at her, the girl surprised him when her hair turned an embarrassed shade of red, while her cheeks also blushed, earning a raised eyebrow and a low whistle from Harry, "Wow, that's a neat trick."

"Professional, Nymphadora!" growled the man who'd attracted Harry's attention more than any of the others.

As soon as he did so, however, Harry saw the girl's red hair darken in colour while her eyes seemed to harden and glow a furious shade of amber-yellow in their sockets as she hissed, "_Don't_ call me Nymphadora, Mad-Eye!"

"Then how about just Nymph, beautiful lady?" asked Harry, earning another sudden blush from the woman with a name she apparently hated, even as Harry asked, "You don't mind _that_ name, do you? It is the name of a magical spirit, after all and, with such an amazing gift and those beautiful looks, you may as well have been sent by Hecate herself."

"Harry…"

"Now, now, Harry, play nicely," drawled Lavender, earning a soft smirk from Mr Malfoy, even as she looked to the blushing Nymphadora before she added, "Sorry about him, Miss Dora; when he sees someone he likes, he's like a fox that becomes a wolf when he sees a vixen."

"And, to think, I'm only eleven," remarked Harry, earning a look of mutual agreement from Lavender, even as the emerald-eyed scion looked back to Dumbledore as he asked, "So, I now know the spiritually-enchanting Miss Nymph, as well as her boss, Mad-Eye Moody…wow, talk about a bad name. Your parents must _really_ have hated you: I mean, what did the teachers call out? _Moody Mad-Eye?_"

"This is _Alastor_ Moody, Harry," said Albus, earning a scoff from Harry.

"Not as funny as Mad-Eye…but I _do_ know that, you old bastard; my beautiful friend here told me everything I need to know: for example, I also know that's Amelia Bones, Director of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, and this is Arthur Weasley, the poor, unfortunate soul who has to call that banshee his wife and the stick-up-his-own-ass his son…ah well, be proud, sir: you have at least _one_ other decent kid, and two yummy looking souls as twins."

"What do you mean your friend told you about everyone?" asked Minerva suddenly, earning a sigh from Harry.

"Well, McGuinness…_ha,_ McGuinness…that's a fun name, but I digress…well, McGaga, as you know from my explanation to the other loud-mouth who got herself involved in my business, my bird's my familiar and as unique as I am."

"I'll say," added Moody, earning a curious look from Harry, even as the deformed man indicated Hela as he told everyone else, "I _never_ thought I would ever see another Gyrphoenix, since they're _supposed_ to be extinct."

"A gyrphoenix?" asked Harry, a note of interest and curiosity in his voice as he asked, "Is that anything like a gyrfalcon?"

"Similar," agreed Moody, earning a raised eyebrow from Harry as the elder man told him, "Just as gyrfalcons are members of the falcon species, gyrphoenixes are a…well, let's call them a bastardised, mutated version of the phoenixes: _unlike_ phoenixes, gyrphoenixes are creatures of _death!_"

"Death?" asked Lavender, earning an intrigued look from Harry, even as Lavender _oohed_ in interest as she told Moody, "Tell us more, Mad-Eye!"

"Not now," said Mad-Eye, looking back to Harry as he added, "We have more important things to deal with, such as your assault on both a student of this school, as well as your willingly-dangerous and with intent to execute, assault on a guest of the school."

"_Actually,_ Mr Moody," said Mr Malfoy, putting his two Knuts in as he explained, "According to testimonies provided by both the Headmaster's colleagues and some reliable sources who, for legal reasons, cannot be named or asked to give such evidence…"

"_His son,_" whispered Harry, earning a nod from Lavender as Mr Malfoy – or Lucius, as Harry later learned – continued.

"Mr Potter's so-called _assault_ on the _noble_ Lady Weasley was an act of self-defence and retaliation to an attack from her on a minor whom is also the Last Scion of the Most Ancient and Noble House of Potter."

"She was washing his mouth out!" exclaimed McGonagall, earning a curious look from Lucius.

"And is that the _normal_ way of Hogwarts to allow such wanton attacks on students who aren't even related to them, or known to them?" asked the blonde, earning a look of mutual agreement from the Nymph-woman, as though she actually agreed and sympathised with Harry's moves, as well as Lucius' argument, even as the blonde indicated Harry before he went on. "Also, when young Mr Potter defended his honour and questioned the fact that such an attack came without argument or cessation or any form of defence from the _faculty,_ whose job it is to _protect_ the students, as I'm sure we all know, he was met with more vileness that then turned on a dear friend of his whom, sources say, is as close to Mr Potter as though she were his betrothed."

"Which she _is,_" said Harry, earning a shocked look from Lavender, which made the young boy smile as he told her, "Sorry, my poison ivy: I _was_ going to see about getting you a ring first before springing it on you, but, ever since I realised I might lose you, I always made a promise that, if we ever met again, I'd make you my girl. That way, no-one could take you from me…so…when I found you again here at Hogwarts…"

"Yes, yes, yes, a _million_ times, yes!" squealed Lavender, earning a small smile from the Nymph woman that, even as Lavender hugged Harry close, the emerald-eyed scion also noted a hint of jealousy in the Nymph-woman's eyes that caused her hair to become edged by green highlights.

Embracing Lavender, Harry leaned in close as he whispered, "Play along…but I _do_ mean this: it was actually Hela who told me that announcing you my betrothed would protect you…and since Old Man Winter _wants_ me here…well, you can't have Jekyll without Hyde."

"I don't care your reasons, my love," argued Lavender, placing a soft kiss on Harry's cheek as she whispered, "I will be yours, whenever you wish to give it to me, gladly."

"That's my girl," agreed Harry, parting from Lavender, who seemed content to sit in Harry's lap, much to Nymphadora's amusement and mild envy, even as Harry looked to Lucius before he added, "Sorry about the PDA, Mr Malfoy, but, as I told this lot yesterday, my Lavender and I grew up together where the only ones we could trust and rely on were each other. What else could I do for such a loyal companion, but offer to make her mine come the day?"

"No apologies, necessary, Mr Potter," agreed Lucius, nodding once as he told Harry, "And may I be the first to congratulate you on your betrothal: now, as such, it would seem your defence of Miss Brown's honour _is_ justified as, being her betrothed, it falls to you to avenge all slurs against her."

"But it wasn't even a magical one!"

"A slur is a slur," said Harry, looking to Minerva as he added, "Just be glad that electrocuting the banshee was _all_ I did, McGrim; were we around some friends of mine, she'd be hung, drawn and quartered, tortured seven ways from Sunday and left to dehydrate in a room with no water and direct sunlight exposure."

"Just for insulting your betrothed?" gasped the redheaded gentleman, earning a scoff from Harry.

"Of course not, sir…_that_ crime would warrant her imprisonment; kind of helps that, among my friends, I'm basically the equivalent of…well, let's just say it'd be interesting to see how someone like Lord Voldemort might treat a favoured son and his heir."

While everyone flinched at the name – save Harry, Lavender and Dumbledore – even Lucius smirked amusingly when he heard Nymphadora address Harry, "What sort of life _were_ you raised in, Harry?"

"The kind where I learned a valuable lesson about myself, lovely Nymph," said Harry, earning another blush from Nymphadora as he explained, "Be all you can be, whatever the cost and no matter the thoughts of others: anyone who doesn't like it, make them remember you. Any that continue to be a pain…well, that's when you'd need chains, swords and the right to release them from this life, once you've made them suffer, made them beg for death…_then,_ you grant their wish!"

"Sweet Merlin!" gasped Mr Weasley, a note of horror in his voice as he asked, "What…what on Earth happened to you, Harry?"

"Unless you want to find out first-hand, _Mr_ Weasley, kindly stop using my name as though we're friends or you're my Father," hissed Harry, earning an alarmed look from Mr Weasley, while Harry straightened himself in his throne as he went on. "Now, since we seem to be reaching the end of this intervention, and my counsel, Mr Malfoy, has given you a pretty strong case about my intentions, I'd say we're done here. So, if you'll all excuse me, Lavender and I have got so-called lessons to go to, power to gain, idiots to punish and, oh yes, deaths to try and give me a reason to cause when I release them from this life, so…_ciao._"

"I…I'm afraid we are not done, Mr…Mr Potter," gasped Amelia, speaking for the first time since walking into the room; however, with how pale her face had gone as Harry argued his case and Lucius painted the image of self-defence and logical actions that he was known for doing whenever a _friend_ of his was put in the spotlight, though the question of why he felt compelled to defend Harry Potter was one that both alarmed and unnerved her, even as she addressed the boy directly. "As…as this is…is your _third_ offence of…of attacking a member of Hogwarts, after…after the reported attacks on Percy Weasley and Professor Severus Snape…"

"Both of which were _perfectly_-justified, Director," argued Harry, shrugging ruefully as he remarked, "One annoyed me because he wanted me to be someone I wasn't, namely my dead Father, and another made the mistake of insulting my betrothed."

"You could have _killed_ him by dropping him off the end of the Grand Staircase!"

"Ah, but I _didn't,_ because I knew Albus here wouldn't allow his sheep to be sheared and defrocked this early in the game," argued Harry, snorting in amusement as he added, "Honestly, I'm broken and scarred, _not_ as insane as some of the dark-natured people I've heard about…though I wouldn't mind meeting them, especially the deliciously-dark-and-devilish-sounding lady Bellatrix Lestrange! She sounds like a real hottie!"

"Harry! Do you know what you're saying?"

"Maybe, maybe not," said Harry, ignoring the horrified looks all round – save for Lucius and, surprisingly, Nymphadora – as he shrugged ruefully before he continued, "Either way, I knew what I was doing and, besides, doing what I did to Mr Weasley paid off."

"How?"

"It showed everyone what would happen if you got in my way," said Harry, sniffing once before he looked to Lavender as he added, "Rule Three."

"What? I don't…_oh_!" gasped Lavender, smiling, as though the Knut had dropped again, while Harry nodded in agreement.

"Rule Three?" asked Moody, earning a nod from Harry.

"A series of rules…well, I'd more call them _guidelines,_ anyway, but they're a series of terms and conditions made to guide us as we enjoy the relationship between me and my girl: Rule One, as much as she _loves_ being the bottom in our relationship, my Lavender can only call me her Master when I let her. Rule Two: Death should be a release, not a punishment, so, no matter how much she pisses me off, whenever she _can,_ she can rest assured I won't kill her for doing it."

"Sweet merciful Morgana!" gasped Filius, earning another nod from Harry, even as the Charms Master asked, "And…Rule Three, Mr Potter?"

"A means of fulfilling our objectives, both with each other and in general," said Harry, tapping his nose as he smiled wolfishly before he added, "As well as the only _real_ rules I listen to, thanks to how I was raised…and we all know who I have to thank for that, don't we, _Albus, my boy?_"

While every head, including Malfoy's, turned to look at Dumbledore, Harry held up one hand as he continued in an amused, but also-clear tone;

"And that third rule is that, in life, and all things, there are only four rules you need to remember: _make the plan, execute the plan, expect the plan to go off the rails…throw away the plan!_"

He held up one finger, as well as his thumb, as he went through his _four-rule Rule Three_, before he lowered his hand again as he explained, "And, trust me, I _did_ make a plan and execute it, both when I came to Hogwarts to make a name for myself and get sorted into Gryffindor House. However, when people _constantly_ decided they had the right to get involved in my life, stick their noses in my business, upset those I consider my nearest and dearest _and_ make me out to be someone and something I _didn't_ want to be…well, that was the plan going off the rails."

"So, doing what he did to Percy, as well as Snape, and even the _poor, unfortunate_ Mrs Weasley was him throwing away the plan," finished Lavender, earning a nod from Harry as he looked to a white-faced Dumbledore.

"I told you I was willing to come and be the student, which was also my way of saying I was willing to play ball, but, thanks to your bleating sheep and your fucked-up ideals, those plans were scrapped…so, if you want someone to blame for what happened, Director and Mr Weasley, look no further than Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore!"

"_Regardless!_" insisted Amelia, earning a shocked look from Harry at how harsh and yet determined she still sounded, even as she continued addressing Harry, "The fact of the matter is you _have_ done this, Mr Potter and, despite your fame, which you yourself have clearly shown us you do not care about, even _you_ cannot get away with what you did."

"Ah…forgot about that," said Harry, looking to Lucius as he added, "Maybe I should have just pleaded the fifth, eh, Mr Malfoy?"

"Not so, Mr Potter," replied Lucius, folding his arms as he drew himself to his full height as he went on, "Because, in lieu of imprisonment or expulsion from this school…"

"Which, let me guess, _he_ pushed for not happening?" asked Harry, jabbing a thumb at Dumbledore.

"Actually, we _all_ agreed that was not the best course of action for one as young as you in such a…vulnerable condition," argued Lucius, though, when Harry looked up to him, he nodded once, as though encouraging the boy to play along, while he continued, "As such, I not only involved myself as your legal counsel, but also as Chief Operations Officer on the Hogwarts Board of Governors to come up with what I hope will be a suitable alternative, as well as a means of avoiding future conflicts."

"I'm listening."

"You will retain your place as a student of Gryffindor House, both you and Miss Brown," said Lucius, earning a nod from Harry, even as the blonde went on. "However, the two of you shall be given new quarters in another part of the school, where, outside of lessons and, in accordance with the ban from competing in extracurricular activities set down by Headmaster Dumbledore, for the foreseeable future, you will be given a house-guard, assigned by the school and the Ministry, whom is to ensure no further squabbles, accidental outbursts or potentially-damaging incidents occur. To ensure this, this same Auror, and it _will_ be an Auror, will make weekly reports to Director Bones and the Board. Then, if you are found to be a character capable of redemption, _next year,_ when you take your second-year classes, we shall debate on whether you are to be allowed your privileges back or if you are to be permanently kept under house arrest in your dormitory."

"You see?" asked Harry, surprising everyone, bar Lavender, at how he wasn't even intimidated by the punishment, "Solitary Confinement and Loss of Privileges: _now_, you're starting to think like my home away from home. Well done, you."

"Potter, be serious!"

"Funny, I thought my name was Harry," drawled Harry, earning a titter from Lavender while even Nymphadora snorted into her hand, though, when she did so, Harry smiled as he asked, "All right, I agree to that…but on _one_ condition of my own."

"You don't make the rules now, Harry."

"Oh, but it's such a _small_ thing I ask for," argued Harry, a note of disappointment in his voice as he explained, "And besides, you _do_ want me to go back to being a good boy again, don't you, Headmaster? So you can give just one _teeny-tiny, incy-wincy_ request, can't you?"

"No!" snapped McGonagall.

"I wasn't talking to you, McGoat's-Milk!"

"It's all right, Minerva," replied Amelia, looking to Harry with a stern glare that _might_ have made lesser men cower, but not Harry, even as she told him, "All right, Mr Potter; we will grant your request, whatever it may be, but only _if_ you stop with these insulting nicknames aimed at your teachers."

"Only if they respect me for the student I am and not the one they _want_ me to be, ma'am."

"Agreed."

"Deal."

"Then, what is it you want?"

"Like I said, it's a small thing," said Harry, lifting a finger before he winked in the direction of his request, which made that particular person gasp, even as Harry pointed to them and made his request known.

"My house-guard: I want the lovely Nymph to be responsible for making sure I toe the line and don't kill anyone too quickly…see? Told you it was a small thing."

**Chapter 8 and, wow, talk about a weird turn of events: nobody **_**wants**_** Harry expelled – then again, Magical Britain are a bunch of idiots who think the world will end if **_**Harry Potter**_** isn't there to pull their asses out of the fire – and, instead, it looks like our hero is being given his last-last chance, but not before he gives them terms: will they agree?**

**Also, will Harry **_**be a good boy**_** or is this just a case of the sleeping dragon being put back to sleep long enough for the little lion cub to grow up, find his fangs and claws and make some **_**new**_** trouble when the time is right?**

**Keep Reading to Find Out**

**Next Chapter: Harry and Lavender explore their new/temporary dormitory while Harry somewhat-reluctantly makes his peace with his peers: however, when his house-punishment gives him an added task before he can really begin 'redeeming' himself, it tests his resolve and leaves the sleeping dragon snarling…uh-oh, is it about to be tickled again?**

**Please Read and Review**

_**AN: Portrayal**_

**Amelia Bones: Jemma Redgrave**


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